Lesley in Hong Kong

Nipple Covers

Marks and Spencer's is a very reliable and homey shop.  You just know where you are with M&S. Their products are renowned for lasting many washes, especially their under garments. You can't beat a pair of M&S knickers.

When I was browsing the under garment section I discovered a new product. Something I had never seen before. In a small plastic pouch was 'nipple covers'. I was intrigued by this item but it was not possible to open the package in the shop so, truly believing all M&S products to be of a high standard I made a purchase.

For those of you mystified as to why a girl should require nipple covers I will attempt to throw light on the matter. You see, when its a bit cold, and your top is a bit on the flimsy side, nipples tend to pop out for the world to see. Living in air conditioned Hong Kong this happens a lot. You step inside after being out in a hot and humid 30+ degrees and out they pop.

I thought that using this new fangled item would be the answer to this little problem.

The next morning I decided to try them.  I opened the packet to find they were made from a thin 'band aid' type material in the shape of large daisies. The center of the daisy was a slightly padded circle. It was early, it was dark in my bedroom, I wasn't properly awake to read the 'How to Apply' section on the back of the packet and besides I couldn't find my glasses.

It seemed straight forward. I peeled off the backing paper and stuck them over my nipples, put the rest of my clothes on and  went to work. Never gave them a second thought.   I wasn't aware of people pointing at me on the air conditioned bus saying "Waa look at her nipples sticking out" so I presumed they were working.

When I got home after a hards days toil the first thing I did was strip off and get in the shower. Upon the removal of my clothes I remembered the hastily applied nippled covers as I glanced at myself in the bathroom mirror. Best take them off now I thought to myself.

Easier said than done.  The very thin sticky cover was almost impossible to get hold of. I have nails but I couldn't just get one under the edge of the nipple covers to remove them. I showered. Tried again.  No better. I showered again and used lots more shower gel to soften the fabric (steady on now!).  Still couldn't get hold of the edge to pull them off.  They were well and truly attached to my breasts and did not want to come off.

I found my glasses and the discarded packet and read the instructions. This was not enlightening at all. It just said stick them over nipples, peel them off when you are finished.  No clues, no hints.

About half an hour had gone by since I got home and I was still naked in the bathroom attempting to remove the offending articles.  Eventually I managed to get my thumb nail under the edge of the left one and began to peel it off.  Oh my God! The pain was excruciating.  There was no way I could just rip it off quickly. I had to slowly, slowly, millimeter by millimeter pull it off and try not to pass out with pain.

I have had two children, I have ran a marathon. I know pain. But this? It was really making me feel nauseous. I came out in a hot and cold sweat and began to shiver. Perhaps I was in shock?  I am guessing that the process took about 10 minutes and it was such a relief to remove the torturous devil item from my delicate anatomy. But wait, horror of horrors - there was still the other one to remove.

I was almost crying at the thought.  I had a lie down to physiologically build myself up to the removal of the second nipple cover.

It was the same horrible experience. Sweating, shaking and on the brink of tears.

Gentle readers - do not ever buy these items. They should have a health warning written on the packaging. I definitely do not recommend them. Don't be fooled by the steady and reliable Marks and Spencer's brand.Give them a wide berth and let your nipples be free.

Nipple Covers

Marks and Spencer's is a very reliable and homey shop.  You just know where you are with M&S.  Their products are renowned for lasting many washes, especially their under garments.  You can't beat a pair of M&S knickers.

When I was browsing the under garment section I discovered a new product.  Something I had never seen before.  In a small plastic pouch was 'nipple covers'. I was intrigued by  this item.  It was not possible to open the package in the shop so truly believing all M&S goods to be of a high standard I made a purchase.

For those of you mystified as to why a girl should require nipple covers I will attempt to throw light on the matter.  You see, when its a bit cold, and your top is a bit on the flimsy side, nipples tend to pop out for the world to see.  Living in air conditioned Hong Kong this happens a lot.  You step inside after being out in a hot and humid 30+ degrees and out they pop.

I thought that using this new fangled item would be the answer to this little problem.

The next morning I decided to try them.  I opened the packet to find they were made from a thin 'band aid' type material in the shape of large daisies.  The center of the daisy was a slightly padded circle.  It was early, it was dark in my bedroom, I wasn't properly awake to read the 'How to Apply' section on the back of the packet and besides I couldn't find my glasses.

It seemed straight forward.  I peeled off the backing paper and stuck them over my nipples. Easy.

I got dressed, went to work.  Never gave them a second thought.  I wasn't aware of people pointing at me on the air conditioned bus saying "Waa look at her nipples sticking out" so I presumed they were working.

When I got home after a hards days toil the first thing I did was strip off and get in the shower.  Upon the removal of my clothes I remembered the hastily applied nippled covers as I glanced at myself in the bathroom mirror.  "Best take them off now" I thought to myself.

Easier said than done.  The very thin sticky cover was almost impossible to get hold of.  I have nails but I couldn't just get one under the edge of the nipple covers to remove them.  I showered.  Tried again.  No better.  I showered again and used lots more shower gel to soften the fabric (steady on now!).  Still couldn't get hold of the edge to pull them off.  They were well and truly attached to my breasts and did not want to come off.

I found my glasses and the discarded packet and read the instructions.  This was not enlightening at all.  It just said stick them over nipples, peel them off when you are finished.  No clues, no hints.

About half an hour had gone by since I got home and I was still naked in the bathroom attempting to remove the offending articles.  Eventually I managed to get my thumb nail under the edge of the left one and began to peel it off.  Oh my God!  The pain was excruciating.  There was no way I could just rip it off quickly.  I had to slowly, slowly, millimeter by millimeter pull it off and try not to pass out with pain.

I have had two children, I have ran a marathon.  I know pain.  But this?  It was really making me feel nauseous.  I came out in a hot and cold sweat and began to shiver.  Perhaps I was in shock?  I am guessing that the process took about 10 minutes and it was such a relief to remove the torturous devil item from my delicate anatomy.  But wait, horror of horrors - there was still the other one to remove.

I was almost crying at the thought.  I had a lie down to physiologically build myself up to the removal of the second nipple cover. 

It was the same horrible experience.  Sweating, shaking and on the brink of tears.

Gentle readers - do not ever buy these items.  They should have a health warning written on the packaging.  I definitely do not recommend them.  Don't be fooled by the steady and reliable Marks and Spencer's brand.  Give them a wide berth.

Bra Fitting Model

In the local free HK Magazine there is often an advert for ‘bra fitting models’.  What an interesting line of work that must be?  I have seen the same advert month after month, it just keeps appearing.  They always specify the size of breasts they need for their models.  Interestingly they seem to be short of large breasted women, in Hong Kong there is obviously a shortage of such types.  I thought I would be a prime candidate for such a position.  I got the tape measure out and sent my ‘statistics’ to an email address given in the advert.  I don’t just send my vitals off to any one; this was Marks and Spencer’s.  I duly received an appointed to time to go along and meet the representatives from M&S and was asked if I minded standing for long periods and it would be necessary to give feedback on the fit of the foundation garments in questions.

Unfortunately I was unable to keep the appointment.  I just don’t think my Principal would have given me time off for such an activity.  I could imagine the questions “Is this  professional development?”  I would be flummoxed to answer so I just went to work as normal.   So this blog goes slightly pear shaped at this point, well don’t we all darling?  I never was a bra fitting model but I SO wanted to be

But I am now full of regret for not doing this because I feel that it would have been a public service.  An act of altruism no less.  You see M&S do not seem to stock the type of bras that us larger breasted ladies require anymore and I blame myself. In my six years here it’s always been a bit of test to get the right style.  Only M&S sell them, the rest of the bra shops in Hong Kong sell teeny tiny bras with 1” of padding.  I don’t need padding! 

I have tried asking for bigger sizes.  The shop assistants go into the back of the shop, are gone for ages, then come back and say “Nothing for you missy” or bring their biggest one which is still too small.  It’s a depressing experience. M&S have usually come up with the goods.  But in the branches I have checked out (Central, Festival Walk, Shatin and Kowloon Bay) there are no underwired bras size 38D with substantial straps.  They only sell bras suitable for sitting down, which offer zero support and sometimes I need to run for my bus.  In my opinion the bras currently on sale are just not practical bras in which to live my life in.

I have surveyed other women with large breasts.  My friend Kim being the main interviewee (although mine are bigger than hers!).  She in turn has asked other women she knows.  The general consensus is that I buy them in other countries when I go on holiday.   But that’s too long to wait.

There is a happy ending.  I want ladies who need real bras to know about this.  Figleaves.com are great.  I ordered three bras, they came, they fit.  Halleluiah!