Door Step Porn

Sometimes, though not often, someone knocks on our front door.  Those of you who have braved the long and arduous hike up the 170 steps to our most inconveniently situated residence will know what a pain it is to  get to.  The amount of times someone has called out of blue is...never.  But last week at around 9.30pm someone did.  I leapt down the stairs to answer with a welcoming greeting hoping to coax them in, who ever it was, for tea and gossip. 

On the door step stood two young Chinese market researchers.  They introduced themselves as government workers and asked if I was willing to answer some questions about the media and censorship in Hong Kong.  As I had made such an effort to get to the front door I thought I'd better say yes.  They were reluctant to come in as they were both terrified of our vicious dog (the one that doesn't know how to bark!)

The nice young lady who appeared to be around the age of 14, but was probably in her late 20's, began to read out very long questions with very complicated multiple choice answers for my selection.  Some of the long words were a bit difficult for her so I had to help out.  After the basic introductory questions to establish who I was she then went on to ask if I considered it appropriate for ladies to show their nipples in newspapers, on television or in magazines available in Hong Kong.  She made no mention of cool air conditioned shopping malls or buses so I presume she had not read my previous blog!  I was slightly taken aback by this question but decided to answer that it was appropriate.

Then the fun part began.  My task, which I chose to accept, was to look through a pile of A4 size photographs and categorize them into  'over 18' or for 'anyone'.  The first photograph took me by surprise.  It was way beyond appropriate nipple exposure and was of a pornographic nature involving items from the women's hygiene section of the chemist.  It wasn't really what I was expecting while standing on my door step in my slippers on a Tuesday night.  I looked through them all to find some quite shocking images of close-up sexual acts as well as milder less potentially offensive shots of Hong Kong celebrities adjusting their bikini bottoms from the crack of their arse.  As well as that there were some quite disturbing cartoons showing violence not intended for Disney by any stretch of the imagination as well as some newspaper front pages featuring recently dead bodies and road traffic accidents.

I carefully categorized the pictures as per the instructions.  When it was over they politely handed me a $50 voucher for the local supermarket and bid me goodnight.  Throughout this experience the market researchers never actually looked at the photographs, they merely noted the number which was written on the back.  Their content was never discussed. It was just as if they were asking me if I was happy with my wash or were my whites white?

I wonder how long I have to wait for the next caller?

Comments

[Indian Humour]

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[David]

Viz Top Tip:You should have taken out a year`s subscription to their `market research` site and posted the pictures AND your editorial comments here on your blog. That would have increased circulation!
Dave