Lesley in Hong Kong

The Future - what happened to it?

Space 1999

In the lead up to the year 2000, I was extremely disappointed that the shiny future I felt I'd been promised would not be ready.   There would be no flying cars or silver catsuits.  There would still be food, as opposed to nutrition-packed pills.   My formative years were filled with images on TV showing me the fabulous futuristic future.  The Jetsons and Space 1999 have a lot to answer for!

 

The year 2000 came and went - still no flying cars or silver catsuits.  I still had to peel carrots and wash-up. 

What will 2020 be like?

2020 will soon be here - I know, I'm shocked too -  That futuristic dream of how science and technology would be so advanced it would be mundane, even domestic, is in tatters.    I dreamt that by the time I reached 2020 (fingers crossed)we would all be living in a peacefully perfect world where all conflicts had been forgotten.  I truly thought that the concept of working from home would be embraced by most people while the amount of leisure time would have been increased.  All folk would have terrifically stimulating hobbies that meant they bonded with others in a warm and comradery way.  No one would need to make the tea because a robot would deal with that, oh and everyone would fly around in their flying car or, even better, use The Transporter from Star Trek. 

In my imagined future, everyone would be warm enough or cool enough and technology would be able to supply all energy for free as that is just a human right.  If we want to keep the world populated then heat and light is a given.  Surely no one needs to profit from that? 

We have spoilt it

But it seems that we have spoilt the future for ourselves in an attempt to make convenience king.  The convenience of buying fresh food has become a multimillion-dollar industry involving factory farming and air transportation for lettuce.  The fast-food industry has fueled our craving for instant gratification so we can now walk around eating and drinking, then dump the plastic containers on the street.  There is now more plastic in the ocean than fish and more landfills than forest.  

Inconvenience should be king

Right now there is a riot going on in my neighbourhood and the conflict seems to have no resolution.  That is tragic enough.  But the most important issue is the unsustainability of our lifestyle.  The future I used to think was possible, those flying cars and silver catsuits, is as far away as the concept of peace in our time because the reality of the future, the air we breathe and the water we drink is filled with pollution created by the craving for convenience we thought we wanted.  

Our future is not one where science and technology make everything convenient.  If we do have a planet to live on, we will have to get used living a much simpler life where inconvenience is king because it is the only sustainable way to keep the population going.  Instead of that flying car, I imagine if I can't get anywhere by walking then I won't be going.  I still fancy that silver cat-suit though... 

 

Hong Kong has a monumental waste problem. (BBC Future)

Dialogue in the Dark

http://www.dialogue-experience.com.hk/web/subpage.php?mid=6

 

Address: Shop 215, 2/F, Nob Hill Square, 8 King Lai Path, Mei Foo, Kowloon
Telephone: 2310 0833 (General) / 2891 0438 (Group Booking) / 2310 8610 (Birthday in the Dark / Special event)

 

Mei Foo MTR Exit C - 5 -7 minutes walk

 

Online Booking

I pre booked an experiential tour in the dark for 22 people.  Their website booking system was a little too restricting for my dates and times but after some very helpful email exchanges I managed to book what I really wanted.

 

This is a very unique experience for adults and children alike.  You'll be outside of your comfort zone and that is something we should all do from time to time.   The basic point of the tour is to experience what it's like to navigate yourself around a busy city (Hong Kong) and all the challenges that involves as a visually impaired person using a white stick.

 

90 Minutes in the Dark

After some instruction about how to hold a white stick, in small groups of eight, we were lead by our visually impaired guide for 90 minutes in complete darkness.  When I say dark, I mean complete and utter blackness for the whole time.  There was no time that my eyes made an adjustment to the environment.  There was no time that I had any idea what the environment looked like or where my guide was.  Although I knew I was with seven other people, there was no time I knew how many where in front or behind me. However, our guide used his voice in the most comforting way.  He gave clear instructions about which direction to walk and when.  

 

The Route

The route took us through various places which we had to feel with our feet, hands and stick as we walked slowly, with trepidation, through the space.    Within the dark dark space a recreation of a wooded area with leaves to feel and a gravel floor to a street scene and even boarding a ferry has been constructed to give sighted people the disarming experience of beginning to know what it's like to be without the sense of sight.   I say beginning to know, because I feel sure that living without sight has many more restrictions than the 90 minutes can ever tell us, but at the same time gave our group an appreciation of the skills required.   It also gave us an idea that our guide was much much more perceptive in the dark than any of us.  He was so aware of us and where we were, remembering our names and guiding, directing and giving us confidence to know where to go, we began to think he was actually wearing night vision goggles.   HE WASN'T.  

 

Back in the Light

Once we were back out into the light and our white sticks returned is when we could see our guide for the first time.   He has been visually impaired since birth.  It was most humbling to meet him and have the opportunity of having a Q&A session with him.  We also had a go at writing braille and using a special plastic device to work out which bank note is which.   There are many gadgets and techniques to help visually impaired people to cope in many different areas of life.

 

Dialogue in the Dark offers many options where, if you are brave enough, you can celebrate your  birthday with  a party in the dark and musical concerts in the dark.   Instruction can be in English or Cantonese. 

 

 

 

 

Ray Lewis The Release Effect TRE

Ray Lewis is visiting Hong Kong from 17th April 2015 for two weeks and can be contacted on   9748 7538.

 

A few years ago I met Ray Lewis on a plane.  We had a very interesting conversation about his job which he told me was 'helping people'.  He explained a little about how he did this and it was so compelling that I followed up his suggestion of reading his website once I was home.  

 

The Release Effect     Take a little time to explore his method if you are interested.

 

 

I pursued his ideas and went ahead and did some, he recommends five,  sessions with him where he asked me questions and then asked me to sit quietly and listen to him.  I cannot really explain what happened after that apart from to say that I was aware of what was happening and could hear his voice.  It was calming and easy.

 

Afterwards, not immediately afterwards, and I can't really be precise about the timing of how my negative feelings were alleviated, but I had a complete change of feeling.  I felt lighter and no longer afraid.  The same old crap was going on but I felt Teflon coated after the sessions and it just didn't bother me in the same way.  I had more strength to live my life.

 

The Release Effect    Ray Lewis

 

Ray in visiting Hong Kong again and will be doing an informative free talk on 20th April at Reflections for all who are interested.   All the details are below from Ruby of Reflections.  

 

 

Reflections - TRE 20th April 2015

 

Ray Lewis spent most of his adult life (more than 20 years) battling severe  manic/depression or bi-polar as it has come to be known, and during that  time he spent thousands of hours and many more thousands of dollars trying  to get "the monkeys off his back".   He was addicted to therapies and would try anything to get relief from the nightmare of his own mind that he was trapped in.  He'd tried different types of therapies, attended umpteen different types of weekend seminar and read hundreds of self help books that inspired him, and according to Ray, they all worked, and provided some relief, but unfortunately, eventually the negative feelings would always come back again.
 

Fifteen years ago through a chance conversation, Ray stumbled across the missing link in the puzzle of the nightmare he found  himself in.  The answer came in the knowledge of a small part of the brain that was relatively unknown until the famous neuro-science professor Joseph  La Doux, (NYU) discovered aspects of a little part of the brain called the Amygdala in the Limbic System, which led to the development of The Release Effect.  

 

The Amygdala can store memories as a feeling memory even before our first conscious memories which usually start around the ages of 2-5.  For example, a baby left alone too long could feel abandoned, which to a baby would feel like a life threatening situation, and then in the future, anything even remotely similar to being alone can trigger the same fight/flight response that the Amygdala remembered from all those years before.  Even though the current situation is not logically relevant to that feeling memory.  The Release Effect does not require a memory of the original event that created the feelings, it does not use analysis of the past.

 

 

 

The Release Effect evolved and in the last ten years, Ray has successfully treated  nearly two thousand people with this technique, to help them get rid of their "monkeys" as well, and finally find that elusive peace of mind. 

 

Ray has been free of his depression and feelings of worthlessness, helplessness, failure, fear of poverty, unappreciated and unloved etc for over 20 years and has devoted most of his time to travelling to take this new approach to people all around the world.  He finds people in Hong Kong to be very open-minded and looks forward to meeting you at an almost free talk on April 20 evening, where you can learn more about The Release Effect.

  Love Offering :     HK$77

 

To join the evening talk on April 20 with Ray, call Reflections on 2504 1333. 

 

 

Related articles

Ray Lewis The Release Effect TRE

Lesley in Bangkok - Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

I have taken myself out of Hong Kong so temporarily I am officially Lesley in Bangkok.  

As there is huge shopping mall about two minutes walk from my hotel and after a day of tiring Grand Palace -ing I couldn't face more walking around and so I purchased a ticket for 150 Baht and went to see Dawn of the Planet of the Apes.

Having suffered at the mercy of arctic air conditioning in Hong Kong I was prepared with my extra clothing to stave off hypothermia and I did truly need it.  I was pleasantly surprised at the comfiness of the seats.  They were big, sumptuous velour  that were high enough for even a tall man's head to rest on so no matter who sat in front of you there would never be a problem of a blocked screen.  They even tipped back a little for ultimate comfort and the bonus option of a double seat, more of a sofa,  for cuddly couples at the back.

Do Not Use Your Mobile Phone

While I waited for the main feature to start I had to endure what I felt was hours of commercials in Thai but they were clearly all good clean public service announcements about not using your mobile phone while driving in case you die and not using your mobile phone in the cinema and causing light pollution in case I kill you - whoops sorry, I didn't mean that last part obviously.  It was a truly welcome advert and I think Hong Kong audiences would get the message if it was pitched in such a way.  Hint hint anyone who texts in their bag and doesn't think it bothers others (me!).

National Anthem

Then after loads of trailers it felt like it was about to start.  Wrong.  Before we could settle down to watch Dawn of the Planet of the Apes we were all instructed politely to stand for the Thai National Anthem.  Everyone did, most respectfully.  It was played while we watched images of the King doing good things  It reminded me that the BBC used to play the British National Anthem before the station closed down for the evening (telly used to stop in those days)  and my Grandad used to stand up, and make whoever was with him, also stand up and show respect.  

Andy Sirkis

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes is part two following on from Rise of the Planet of the Apes which stared James Franco as the 'human' and Andy Sirkis as Caesar the Ape.  The skill of playing an animal who so clearly has strong emotions has become Sirkis's unique talent.  Through motion capture technology and his eyes, we become strongly involved with Caesar.

There is no Franco in Dawn of the Planet of the Apes but Sirkis again plays Caesar and we see him as the dominant male in a colony of apes in a time when nearly all humans have been killed by a Simeon flu.  Or have they?  I don't want to throw in any plot spoilers only to say that its one of the best films I've seen in along time and if you are considering going along to see it, watch the first one so you understand how Caesar's role in the film and as leader evolves.  

The CGI  is breathtaking.  The sound quality in that particular cinema meant I kept looking over my shoulder to see if there was a monkey making too much noise behind me.  The score worked perfectly to build scenes to their climax.   The stilted dialogue communicates just how two different points of view can be the same yet equally confused and misunderstood.  It touches on racism, religion, stereotypes and is a study of the human condition in adverse circumstances.  A reflection of what is still going on in certain parts of the world this very day.

 

Dunsinane - Auditorium, Kwai Tsing Theatre

 

A production by the National Theatre of Scotland and the Royal Shakespeare Company.

2nd - 4th May this prestigious production was performed in Kwai Tsing Theatre.  The nearest MTR station, Kwai Fong, exit B to be precise.  

 The Venue

I really cannot stress enough just how smart this theatre is.  I assumed that because I was going to Kwai Fong in the New Territories on a Saturday night it would be something of a sub standard forgotten building.   How wrong I was.  Kwai Tsing Theatre is beautiful, modern, clean with an excellent sound system.  The toilets were great, plenty of them and all well stocked, and most importantly the temperature was just right.  There was no freezing arctic moments to contend with.  What more could one want from a night out at the theatre?  Oh yes, now I remember.  A bar. 

Everyone expects a glass of wine at the intermission, don’t they?

 

Dunsinane is set in 1054 Scotland, written by David Greig in 2010. It is a dramatic sequel to MacBeth.  Just exactly what does happen to Scotland after the death of brave MacBeth?  Is MacDuff king?  Do Malcom's sons return to claim their right to the thrown?  These and more questions will be answered in Dunsinane.  

 Cheeky Sequel

Is it cheeky to write a sequel to a great Shakespeare work?  

It certainly is, and that's why it is so wonderful.  As we all know sequels can be bad.  Part 2’s can be awful,  with the exception of Toy Story 3 obviously.  Perhaps because hundreds of years have passed since the original work, it can be described as cheeky to take liberties; such as keeping Lady MacBeth alive and kicking, not particularly as bonkers as she was the last time we heard her scream and then go silent as she jumped from a balcony.  I suppose if Bobby Ewing can wake up and it all be a dream and Jean Rhys can rename Bertha, the mad woman in the attic in Jane Eyre, Antoinette, then Lady MacBeth, henceforth known as Gruach, can be alive. 

It is an excellent play and I suspect even more well received in Scotland prior to the coming referendum.  Keep those English out! 

 

Remember when we spoke on the telephone?

When I was 11 I had a birthday party at my house.  I know this because I have photographic evidence of all the girls in my class sitting our settee.

When I was 16 I had a party at my house when all the girls and boys came.  I have no photographic evidence of this but it did happen.  It had all the elements of bad behaviour like any good 16th birthday celebration should.  The next day there were a few tears and voices raised in anger but I'm secretly proud that the neighbours were disturbed, the tropical fish had to suffer cider in their tank, some guests were in rooms they really shouldn't have been in and there was ash and spillages associated with under age drinking.

When I was 18 I had a bus load of people visit The Beer Keller in Newcastle (won the fancy knicker competition and was offered a job as a go-go dancer) who all paid towards the bus, had a good time at The Beer Keller, got back on the bus at the agreed departure time and all came home again. There is photographic evidence of this but it's not for general release.

The way that these parties were organised was through speaking to the people I wanted to invite. Those people were the people I wanted to come.  A fairly simple yet effective method with no agenda other than to have fun.  It went a bit like this "I'm having a party on  (insert date and time) do you want to come?" and the answer went a bit like this "Yes".  And then, here is best bit, they came to the party and had a good time.  In the run up to the party there was little to no communication necessary and on the day of the party people turned up at the right time at the designated place.  

 If I could not speak to them face to face then the alternative method of communication was over the telephone when a telephone number, which I had written in an address book or I had memorized, was dialed at an appropriate time when I estimated that person to be at home.  The message was conveyed and the response was immediate.

I don't remember a time when someone was doing something more interesting or didn't have time?

Obviously the people I was interacting with were teenagers without the burden of employment or the responsibility of babies or spouses but it seemed a very simple process.  Whereas in this age of smart phones and Facebook the process of inviting someone to anything seems to result in a cornucopia of flakiness and people who are so busy they cannot even reply with a cohesive answer or worst of all remain silent because they want to give the impression they are too busy.  The other message about the the 'silent' part is that it means a rejection but you have to guess that part yourself. 

Before the texting facility there wasn't any need to inform any one that you were on your way a number of times before you arrived , were lost, were running late or had a better offer and were not actually going to turn up as you had originally said.   This was also mostly impossible because once you left your own house you had no access to a phone unless you found a phone box, had the right change and knew the phone number of the person who was having the party.  If the party was not at a place where a phone could be answered none of the progress reports were possible and no one cared any way. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UiLaukbxQMs

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WFR4PPxp2z8

 

A Facebook event is also a cornucopia for misunderstanding as well as the presumption, by some, that because you have ticked the box indicating that you can't go, you feel the need to write a few sentences about just how much more exciting and interesting your life is that you can't go  to a planned event that someone has spent time planning and taken the time to appreciate you and invite you.

It goes a bit like this

Friend has invited you to an event - Party (date, time place)  

Going   Not Going  May Be

And you need to tick a box.  That is it.  What you are not asked to do is announce to the other invited guests that you can't go because:-

Sorry can't come because we'll be in The Maldives {or any other named luxury holiday destination which will evoke feelings of jealousy} having our best holiday ever in our lives. (sub text - having a better time than we would at your party)

Would love to come but we are so busy right now, you know what it's like?  (sub text  - going to work, coming home, eating and dealing with other stuff that life brings along just like every one else but frankly I can't be arsed and don't like you very much) 

Can I let you know next week? (sub text - I might have a better offer by then so I'm keeping my options open when I can outrageously reject your invitation in favour of someone else's but if their invitation doesn't seem all that good then I'll come to you)

Sorry can't come I have family gathering that day. (sub text  - I always have family stuff to do but I'm telling you this to make you understand that you are lowly on my scale of priorities).

 

In this new texting world some etiquette needs to be followed.  In the same way as good manners were taught to us when we were children, we all need some proper rules and guidelines to follow in the world of cyber communication. We can then teach these to our children who will then be able to operate in the 21st century in the right and proper way.  

Oh hang on!  By the time they grow up and enter the world of work there will be some other new way of communication that we hadn't even thought about and we'll be no further forward....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TEDx Hong Kong ED - School's Out

TEDx HongKong - ED

Saturday 15th June 2013 10am - 4pm

633 Kings Road, Quarry Bay, Hong Kong

 

Website for more information  click here

Ideas Worth Spreading

'The fact is that given the challenges we face, education doesn’t need to be reformed — it needs to be transformed'

-Sir Ken Robinson

I discovered TED Talks on You Tube a few years ago and I use it from time to time in my classes.  Sometimes I come across one that really hits the spot of a particular concept I want to explain and sometimes they are just so damn interesting I bring them into my classroom to inspire my students. The point is that speakers on TED Talks can present an idea so much better than I can.

For instance I grew weary of listening and watching my students do presentations locked in the the restricting mind numbing Microsoft world that is PowerPoint.  I decided to have a power point free year.  I showed them all the TED Talk - A Modest Proposal,  David Bohannon explaining a scientific concept through dance and although didn't expect them to bring that exactly into the small space in front of the whiteboard, I did expect some imagination and creativity so they would at least think about presenting their ideas differently.  I got it.  I had Y7s playing music, rapping, singing, role playing and making art in stead of reading their dry power points.

Click here for more inspiration

When I start teaching the IB English A Language & Literature course (International Baccalaureate site) and all that it involves, the following TED Talk - Jay Walker on the World's English Mania is a marvellous introduction and discussion point for my students to start thinking about the way English is used around the world.  

When I became aware that TEDx was coming to Hong Kong to talk about education I quickly registered and bought my early bird ticket in order to secure my place.  

The event in Quarry Bay was from 10am - 4pm and we were encouraged to register by 9am to ensure a seat.  I felt it would be quite a test of our dwindling concentration spans as I read the itinerary.  As any teacher knows keeping the attention of an audience involves short bursts of information with a variety of ever changing strategies to hold their interest.   Overall this was achieved and the clever addition of the most coordinated man on the planet, Chris Brien and his percussion group 'Tribe' was inspired.  Of course he didn't just perform, he explained his notion that rhythm can bring out creativity, improve IQ levels and boost the immune system  Mozambique Drum Lesson 40 .

I obeyed the instructions and  got there early to take my seat on the 1/F.  It was announced that there were 1000 people attending the event which was actually in the space of the Island Evangelical Community Church and on two floors.  1/F where the stage was with the real live speakers, and 2/F where it was streamed onto to screens.  The rooms were very nicely appointed but surely there are bigger spaces in Hong Kong where everyone could be seated on the same floor?  

When it came to a break and my entitlement to a free drink, I felt that in the short time and given the amount of people, would mean there was no chance to join that queue as well as the queue for the ladies toilets!  Good job I'd brought my own.

I have a feeling that God had kind of sneaked into this event through the back door.   But we were sat in a church so may be he did use the same entrance as everyone else?  Brett Hillard the Senior Pastor of Island ECC spoke with ease, was engaging and certainly made this atheist think.   I was particularly impressed with his creative marketing and brochure ideas and am still allowing the phrase "If you are not failing you are not trying" run through my mind.  

I had my eyes opened by Julian Zhu, excuse the pun, to an organisation called Dialogue in the Dark

Activities to book which is, according to Trip Advisor, Hong Kong's most popular attraction.  DiD is an experiential venue to help understand what it is like to be visual impaired.  With a white cane in hand and eyes bound shut you are guided around a variety of every day places for 175 minutes. There are options for Eating in the Dark and Birthdays in the Dark.The summer holiday is coming up and I certainly intend to visit.

Merijn Everaarts was compelling regarding the epidemic of one use plastic containers used in Hong Kong and his illustrations and statistics really did bring home the message that we will soon drown in waste.  He has developed a sustainable plastic bottle called The Dopper and The Dopper Water & Waste Academy aims to empower citizens to take personal responsibility for reducing waste.  Note to self - tap water in Hong Kong is safe so why do I buy it in bottles?  

From a personal point of view I have been teaching in Hong Kong for 10 years now.  I did my PGCE at The University of Hong Kong and have worked in local schools.  The message I left HKU with was that I should be a 'change agent' and bring about change in the syllabus by incorporating new ways of teaching into the schools in Hong Kong where students are under a vast amount of pressure to pass exams and constant testing evades every waking hour.  Unfortunately the waking hours seem to be once the students are home and in the middle of the night.  Sleeping in class is so common it is acceptable behaviour.  Sleeping in the staff room is also acceptable.   I am not in the local system at the moment but I know that educational reform in Hong Kong is an up hill battle.  I cannot comprehend why any reform is resisted but find it a complete paradox that research regarding new ways of teaching in Hong Kong is blinkered.  The so called 'new ways' of teaching are not in any way new, they go on in the rest of the world as common good practice but in Hong Kong if they are not sitting in rows and passing or failing tests, are not under stress to complete after school tuition or are not carrying spine crushing bags they are not good students.   It was, therefore, with great interest and expectation  that when Sophie Leung took the stage with her tag line 'Instilling Hope to Students in a Skewed Education System' I thought I would hear something new.  She fell well short of the mark and was yet another Hong Kong voice of empty cliches with no actual concrete idea.  

Dr Yvonne Chiu was a very interesting speaker with an array of extremely complex ideas, notions and theories.  Since I returned from TEDx I have read more about her ideas, she made me curious and wanting more.  She had an impact on me.

Peter Kenny, who was last, and I guess was 'top of the bill' was extremely engaging and obviously used to the stage.  He spoke of inclusion, international schools and local schools building links to address the situation we currently have in Hong Kong of having huge waiting lists for international schools yet local primary schools closing down in the local system with not enough students to attend them.  My only complaint was that I wanted him to speak for longer.

CEO Reach Education Organization 

There were 13 speakers expressing their ideas about education in Hong Kong and asking us to question whether we are doing the right thing for children, the  city itself and the future.  Each segment will be available to the public via the recordings made on the day so everyone has the opportunity to listen. 

 

 

 

 

Ear phones - are they the curse of the young?

It is with great trepidation that I want to start this blog with "When I was young" because the sub-text reads "I am old now". Perhaps it's not about age, perhaps its about technological advances, which have been vast over the last 48 years?  Such changes make the way things were and the way things are now result in making me feel wise and experienced. See how I steered that away from using the 'old' word there? I am talking specifically about the way I listened to music and was introduced to new music because it is so very different to the way that happens now.

Music Centre

When I was growing up in my house we had a television and a record player in the living room, a radio in the kitchen and when I got to be about 14 I had a portable record player in my bedroom which sat on the floor. The living room was where the records, 45s and LPs, were kept in a special stacking unit under the teak display cabinet next to the telly which had 3 channels. The only progress I remember was when we got a colour telly which meant we could watch Play Days on BBC2 in colour. We also got a music centre which meant we could play the radio, cassette tapes and records on the same piece of equipment. All of these music playing machines were kept in the same corner of the living room.

 

Parent's Music Taste

The way music was played back then meant that everyone in the family got to hear your choice of music. My mother liked John Denver and my dad liked Irish folk music. When they put their records on I listened to the tracks. I learned the words of many songs just because they were being played in the background while I went about my business. When I played my records they listened to my choice. When I was deeply involved with Donny Osmond's Puppy Love and played it loud enough so I could hear it in the garden (with the arm across so it repeated) there was a few tuts but I continued to listen and so did they. When my brother was all consumed with Steve Harley and Cockney Rebel and what became a life long love of punk I also became knowledgeable about punk music even though I only owned The Osmonds and David Essex LPs.

 

Top of the Pops - BBC Radio 1

Then there was Top of the Pops and Radio 1.  That was the way I heard new music and decided if I liked it enough to buy it.   The new number one was announced on a Sunday and I would listen for hours to ensure that I knew who it was so I would be all knowledgeable on a Monday morning at school.  And then on Thursdays that number one song would be the last to be played on TOTP. 

There was a time when me and my brother would attempt to use our small cassette player to record music from the telly.  This meant standing by until the disc jockey had announced the band (sometims that would be Jimmy Saville) and then pressing record and play simultaniously and then, most importantly, remain totally silent until it had finished thereupon jumping up to press 'stop' so as not to get Jimmy or Tony or Dave or Noel's voice on the recording. 

I remember this proving really difficult during Sugar Baby Love by the Rubetts because the lead voice was so incredibly high it made us convulse into fits of laughter and have to go in the kitchen until that bit was over. 

Purchasing Music

Based upon my exposure to music via Top of the Pops or Radio 1 I would decide whether I liked a song enough to buy the single and then if I really liked the artist whether to go the full distance and buy their LP, which would have tracks on both sides, that I'd never ever heard and was taking a huge risk shelling out my hard earned Saturday girl money for.

When I got home and put the record on everyone else got to hear it.  I took it rounds my friend's house sometimes so they could hear it too. 

New Way

These days the way I listen to music and find out about new music is completely different.  It is hardly ever from the television and when I listen to the radio I do it through a podcast of various BBC shows and for copyright reasons I can only listen to the voice of the DJ, the music is not available.  The people around me do not pollute my space with their music.  That would be rude.

They play their own personal music through earphones into their brain.  So my question is how do we know about other people's music and new music?  I feel my music education happened because I had to listen to the music of others and be exposed to various different tastes.  I had to listen to music I didn't particularly like so as to get to the stuff I did like.

Now it is possible to only buy selected tracks from albums which I think is a real shame because when you have a whole album you start off liking some tracks and then you might warm to the others over time.  But if you never gave yourself the chance in the first place and only bought a few tracks then you could be missing out?

Earphone benefits?

Earphone wearing has its benefits - I understand that.  But as we all go about our business listening to our own personal music through earphones we may fail to be exposed to music of different eras and genres because although the range of music available to illegally download via You Tube is vast, I suspect only a small amount is explored because it seems that the same narrow range music is being listened to all over the globe in the same way as T-shirts and jeans are the most common choice of dress all over the world. 

There are homes all over the world where 3 or 4 people may inhabit the same living space but no one plays their music out loud into the room,  they all listen to their own private music pumped into their ears via earphones and thus depriving the rest of the household from saying 'turn that bloody noise down' or even better 'is that a girl or a bloke singing that?"

Children can be sucked into their own You Tube Itunes world and never know the musical taste of their parents, never have to suffer their parents Radio 2 choice of music, never know all the words to American Pie and never have the opportunity to get to know where the original track came from.

 

 

Peripheral Vision

I am truly aware that the subject of walking along the pavement does not, on the face of it, seem like a subject to spark much interesting conversation. And for those of you who absolutely and completely disagree with the above and before you start yelling at your screen.

 

I feel your pain.

 

I am truly aware that walking along the pavement in Hong Kong has been covered and at the risk of seeming hyperbolic - seven million times before! It even has a name 'Asian drift'

 

Moreover (*see below) I am truly aware that people, and by that I mean people who are my friends or could be a potential friend) understand, appreciate and embrace the unwritten rules of pavement etiquette. The subtext meaning, and I feel it necessary to be completely transparent here, because if you don't understand pavement etiquette you may not get that you are not and never will be my friend if you don't practice pavement etiquette.  I have standards. 

In an all embracing positive educational lesson in personal growth the following is the previously unwritten, unspoken pavement etiquette for those of you who need it spelling out.

Pace

Keeping a pace or speed that enables the rest of humanity on the pavement  to smoothly convey themselves from lets say, their home to their work place, and not make them explode out of frustration due to the snail pace adopted by many pavement etiquette challenged people is the number one essential skill.   Walking faster than a depressed sloth is unacceptable.  Speed up!

One foot in front of the other

Getting from point a) to point b) can be much more efficient if each footfall is approximately the size of two of your own feet, one in front of the f***ing other.   This is simply achieved by picking up each foot and moving it swiftly forward.  It is essential to miss out dragging the heel of the shoe, sandal or flip flop along the pavement in a sluvenly manner.  I may need to point out that once the first foot has made it the second one should follow for the sake of succinct progress.

Stelthness

I am not suggesting you adopt a cat burglar style of walking simply a quieter one.  Pay attention to any noise you tend to make whilst in the act of walking.  If you can hear a rhythmic shushing noise which stops when you stop walking, that's you.  If you are unaware of how the noise occurs try picking your feet up as you walk and resist the temptation to drag making an annoying shushing.  I am also  aware of podiatrist advice that flip flops are really bad for your feet and also posture and cause long term spine damage, so get some shoes that stay on your feet and allow you to run for a bus if you need to.

Straight Line

In these days of smart phones there is the fairly new phenomenon of texting/viewing/sexting/lisening/adding/capturing while walking.  But, dear reader, the phenomena of drifting off the unmarked walking in a straight line - line is not new.  It is common and has been common for years and years that in Hong Kong pedestrians are given to literally wandering along pavements in a meandering fashion.  The indecisiveness of  the drifitng walk is frustrating given that pavements here are busy, in fact chockablock full of folk, all meandering along causing difficult access for others who simply want to overtake.  Without actual lines drawn on the pavement (and that is another idea hatching) the drifters are simply unable to sense another pedestrian in their peripheral vision resulting in a person (me for instance) in several failed attempts to get past. 

I try approaching from the left and just as I am in danger of getting my foot entangled with theirs they veer off to the left so I have to slow down and hang back in their slip stream while I change tactics and try the maneuver from the right.  Then there may be a possible elbow touching or shoulder bag blockage once again forcing me back into their slip stream and once again, getting frustrated now, having to walk behind a slow paced, flip flop dragging pavement etiquette challenged individual who has no peripheral vision capability.

My advice for those of you who do not realize when other people are overtaking you is to turn you head to the right or left occasionally and look.

Groups

Now to tackle the group walking along the pavement which is difficult enough to negotiate when in the group.  But to be forced into an encounter with a group and by that I mean three or more, is incredibly frustrating.  A group becomes an impenetrable mass impossible to overtake and who so often adopt a sloth paced shuffle blocking access to shop door ways or various differing turn off points along the pavement.  Should an innocent solo pavement user, like myself, decide that she wants to break away from her straight line, fairly fast paced, stealth-like walk and enter a shop,  then a group is present on  said pavement, it is near impossible to make them aware of the necessary change of direction she wants to take. 

The present situation means that a shoulder tackle of some force has to be used in order to get through the group who are heading straight (ish).  Unbelievably at these times when barging and pushing has been absolutely necessary, the members of the group adopt a hurt and shocked attitude as if they are completely unaware of the blockage they are causing.  In fact I believe they believe they are the only people on the pavement or actually in the world because their empathy with other pavement users is zilch. 

My advice to group pavement walkers is to adopt some semblance of good manners and try standing to one side while gesturing with one hand a clear and unobstructed path for any other solo pavement user to pass in front.  You could make this experience a little more enjoyable for all concerned if you said "After you" or similar, at this point. 

Couples

Walking down a crowded street holding hands is particularly annoying and blocks the steady flow of other pavement users.  Stop it!

Door Holding

Holding a door for anyone is an alien concept in these parts.  There are two ways to improve this situation.  If you go through a door first and someone is directly behind you it is good manners to hold the door for then as opposed to letting it go and risk it slamming in their face.  If you approach a door and there is a woman with a baby in a pushchair behind you, open the door wide for her and let her go first.  This goes for disabled people or injured people and is not grounds for a medal just expected behaviour in the civilized world.  Do it!

* moreover is a word that needs to be eliminated from Hong Kong.

See me - that is my teacher voice - all who continue - for detention and possible spanking.

Learn to type young man, learn to type! Smart phone usage update.

I know it's quite a radical way of thinking but I want to put it out to you all that every one should learn to type on a keyboard using all of their fingers and thumbs.  This also involves sitting up straight at a desk with feet flat on the floor.  This skill is not taught formally yet millions of people use a keyboard every day. 

To become a skillful touch typist it takes around six weeks to master the home keys of

ASDF (SPACE) JKL;

and after that each finger is taught to remember where the other letters are. It is not that difficult, just repetitive.

Six weeks is not a lot of time.  I can type as fast as I can think. 

Now I have a smart phone I can use one finger nail to type a message or alternatively two thumbs.  This is proving quite difficult, inaccurate and frankly it's a right palaver.   I am a ham fisted, special needs lummox at smart phone typing.

I did say I would keep you posted regarding the evolution of my smart phone usage - well I've been rating it at the status of 'hate' but in the last day it's gone up, slightly,  to 'I'm not really getting on with it'

And frankly why do I need notification beeps when someone emails because when I decide to look at my laptop I can see that information - when I decide to look...is the need for immediate response that great?  I am not a world leader or whiz invester who needs to buy - no - sell...

 

 

Smart...phone....

As of tomorrow I will be live.  I will have all the  online time I could possibly need 24 hours a day.

It's true.  Tomorrow my new and shiny smart phone will buzz and click and connect to the world.  A  drum roll is appropriate.

 

But it is not without trepidation that I am entering into this world of interconnectedness - I am ambivalent about this fancy technology. 

Is it right? 

Is this the way to go? 

Do I want to read my phone in between mouthfuls of food?  I get the message that I am really second in line to the order of importance during a conversation if some one has their phone in their hand and is distracted by the contact to the outside world.  Surely its me who is the most important person, the person who is there, face to face? Having a mobile phone right there on the table is saying "I've got better options than to talk to you".

I can understand that sometimes a conversation may lag a little.  Pregnant pauses and hesitations are fairly normal and I can see that the competition between me and the rest of the world is vicious.  I could easily come in a close second to the rest of the world.

Gone are the days when you wrote a letter, went to the post office for a stamp, posted it and then rushed down to the letter box each morning to snatch the reply out of the postman's hand - or the other one - when you stand their feeling dejected because there is no letter from anyone.  There is no clack of the letter box and the whistling postie carries on past your house to next door.

I feel a song coming on "Stop! Wait a minute Mr Postman" needs an equivelant, in this twenty first century someone really needs to write a song based on the feeling of after a text is sent when the recipient fails to respond in the 'average' smart phone time zone world thus rendering feelings of incredible frustration and down-right anger until the relief of a response beeps through the ether. 

The second verse of this yet to be written song will involve describing the disappointment when the response is a solitary smiley face and no words or worse, merely LOL.  The only way to alleviate these feelings is to enter into a continuous text message fest where messages and replies received can be measured in nanoseconds and then happiness and a resolution is achieved.   It will never end.  It could be the longest song in the world?

I intend to report back my usage of my smart phone in one week and describe my life changing experience.  Watch this space.

 

 

Ode to the Transport Department - part 2

I've warned you!

Do you remember the thrill of receiving actual post.  Paper letters that dropped through the letter box, landing on the hall floor tiles, looking enticing.  What could it be?  A love letter from a distant boyfriend?  A cheque from a recently deceased uncle's estate?  A long newsie letter from a friend you haven't seen in ages?

How it used to be done

These days correspondence, meaning paper letters, are few and far between.  Email is the favoured mode of communication, even utilitiy bills and bank statements are online with a cocophany of security devices of such a high level that even Tom Cruise couldn't work out your user ID or password never mind operate the card scanning machine combined with a secure password generator to check if that air miles coupon has been received yet.

But today I got a letter.

The outside of the envelope revealed that it was On Government Service and from the Transport Department and as you know, gentle reader, I now have a deep and inimate relationship with them due to the high volume of correspondence that has been exchanged between us over the last two weeks.

Feeling nervous, a slightly raised heart rate and bit of a sweat, I tore open the white official envelope in the giddy anticipation of receiving confirmation that they now have my new address and all is well with the world.

Gutted!

They have returned to me, at my new address (this is the operative phrase here) {to the tune of the 12 Days of Christmas} my used envelope with stamp, my original letter informing them of the change of address, their letter to me asking for proof of address, a photocopy of 2 utility bills showing the new address, their letter to me saying they cannot accept the new address because I did not send a photocopy of my ID card, a photocopy of my ID Card and photocopy driving licence just to be on the safe side, and now their new letter to me, at my NEW ADDRESS with the option of 'Other' ticked and then hand written on the line.

'The new address is different with the address proof'

meaning that although they have now returned my documents and their documents to me three times to MY NEW ADDRESS and I have replied plus they have phoned me and spoken to me about this matter, they are unable to process the 'application' at the moment.

This is because the way the telephone company has written my new address on their letter to me is slightly different to the way I wrote my new address on my letter to the Transport Department and now they are confused. 

I have now tried their online service where 'Change of Address' is an option.  I clicked on a few 'Agree to Terms and Conditions' boxes and then waited.  Nothing happened for a good 3 minutes and it warned me that the process could take 5 to 10 minues.  After a while up popped an error message telling my system did not support their requirements to complete this Change of Address online process.

I am casting my eyes upwards to a higher being for help now.

If I was Basil Faulty I would lash the whole of the Transport Department with a tree branch.

If I was Mr Angry from Purley I would throw the phone down.

 

 

Letter to the Transport Department HK - an ode.

Dear Transport Department,

The continuing saga of my change of address

When I wrote you a letter informing you of my change of address you kindly replied immediately to my new address returning to me my used envelope and stamp, my original letter plus a pre printed letter from you asking me to provide proof of my new address by sending you copies of a recent utility bill so that you could confirm I had, in fact, changed my address.

I obliged immediately and copied a recent phone bill which I put in a new envelope and addressed to you, put my first letter in the new envelope together with your letter asking for a photocopy of said bill, the photocopy bill and then posted it to you.

Upon receipt of the letter, your letter and the requested photocopy bill showing my new address, you very kindly phoned me to tell me that I had failed to include a photocopy of my HK ID Card so could I either fax a photocopy of the HK ID card to you (because you can't receive emails) or go to the Transport Department and produce the HK ID Card so that you could verify that I am the person I say I am and that I have in fact changed my address.

After a little bit of negotiation we decided between us that I would post a photocopy of my HK ID Card to you so you informed me that you would post the original letter I sent to you informing you of my change of address, the letter you sent to me at my new address asking for the copy utility bill plus another letter asking me to send a photocopy of my HK ID Card to you so that you could verfy my new address.

I received in the post this very morning a fairly bulky letter from you, at my new address, returning my original letter, you letter to me asking for a utility bill, my photocopy of a utility bill, your letter to me asking for a copy HK ID plus my used envelope with attached used stamp duly stapled to the whole pile of papers.

I have today sent you a (to the tune of '12 days of Christmas' now)  copy of my HK ID Card, your letter asking me to send my HK ID Card, my copy of my utility bill addressed to me at my new address, your letter to me at my new address asking for a copy bill and my first letter to you informing you of my new address.

I am now wondering if the information I have sent you will surfice or will you need a photocopy of my arse before you are satisfied.

Regards

Lesley in Hong Kong

 

A Poem

 

How HK Expat Zeitgeist are you?

 

Are you whole house, or top floor
Duplex living, out in DB or Midlevels, are you moving
near the tunnel, with your soft top
Is the school good, and the teachers
Do you zumba, or play netball
Is it Curves, when you've got time

Majong or to Shehnzen, with mainland and congestion

Are you android, or just wireless
on your iphone, makes you feel good
Are you connected, on Facebook, or Skyping
back to home town, do they know you?
in the real time, would you go home, if you knew where

 

Immigration, with the masses

Have your thumb print, and the forms filled

Is it legal can they do that – can you make me?

Are you public, red taxi on the metre

Get a good price, if you ask him

Did you say that?  Did you get there?

Were you on time, is it faster

Is it OK, to be scathing, international or the locals

 

Are you aware that you are living on the edge of a communist regime with a woeful human rights record and a demographic transition interconnected with commercialism on a global scale?

 

Do you have - an air purifier

And a maid from Manila

Is she on time,  keeps your house clean,  an accountant

Does she cook, for your husband can she massage

Pick out presents, for the play dates

Comes in handy for the handoffs

On Sundays, do you miss her

 

After Christmas, can you pay it

Does your bonus really cut it

Did you weekend in The Hyatt, was the buffet as expected

Fizzy white wine from New Zealand,

With the sushi and the chocolate, not from Hong Kong

Always imports, is it hep B you recover from

 

Local media, do you see it

Can you miss it,

RTHK in a time warp

The advice from Legco

Be happy and be nice, to your family and the dentist

Use a cliché if in doubt.

So I guess what I’m kinda asking
While I’m kinda multi tasking
Is how freakin Zeitgeist are you?

 

Illegal Structures in the New Territories

There has been a flurry of activity in the local Hong Kong press recently on the topic of so called 'illegal structures' and the blind eye that is metaphorically turned when residents of 700 square foot apartments get ideas of making their life better and giving themselves a little more space.  The press have conjured up headlines such as:-

Government Faces Pressure over Illegal Structures

Rural Roofs spur double-standard rap

Limited Agreement offered on Illegal Structures

But the fact remains that way back in 1972 the 'Small House Policy' came into force allowing indigenous males the right to build a 'small house' in the New Territories.  Under this policy, a person over 18 years old who is descended through the male line from a resident in 1898 of a recognized village in the New Territories in Hong Kong may apply to the authority for building a small house on a suitable lot once in their lifetime. 

Not surprisingly, for Hong Kong,  the rules that came with this policy are typically baffling and obstructive to anyone with an ounce of creativity or common sense.  What has been constructed as a result of this policy are masses of identical, ugly, houses in a mock 'Spanish' style.  All are three stories and all are 700 square feet per floor because... these are the rules.

We are now into 2011 but anyone who wants to build a new house or renovate an existing badly designed village house is restricted by the rules that exist because they exist.

Ecofriendly Houses

There are many examples globally of good design and sustainable living where materials and specifications blend in with the traditional style and scenery of the area.  Houses where the design takes into account growing families and the need for storage, efficient heating or cooling systems as well as appreciation of the way a typical family operates with need for privacy as well as spaces to interact.

Bad Design

What we have here in the New Territories are ugly, badly designed living spaces that are freezing cold in the winter with no appliances supplied to heat or cool the space.  Air conditioners knocked into walls as an after thought causing noise and drips.  More often than not the kitchens are simply a bench and any appliance such as a fridge or, wait for it, an oven, may not even fit into the designated area.  There is no whisper of storage space for kitchenware or clothing in any room.  If a family has an idea of washing their clothes at home then fitting a machine into the house will be looked upon as some alien weird idea so the only place to have one is OUTSIDE.  Yes its true.  You have to put your ELECTRIC washing machine on the balcony or on the roof and hope that it doesn't short circuit during rain storms.  I know you can buy washing machine covers from Japan Home Stores but come on, when did that start to become acceptable?

There is a lot of hot air and fuss being created about so called illegal structures in the New Territories when all residents want to do is improve their living space which was badly designed in the first place and too small.  Instead of fixating on old and outdated rules about the small house policy we should be accepting of the fact that it is possible to be flexible and allow differently designed houses that have humans who occupt them and the way we live in the 21st century in mind.

The very idea of restricting people to a smaller space when they have a rooftop available to them is draconian. 

Instead of harking back to a time when there were no illegal structures on rooftops the government should be employing creative architects who can move with the times, build sustainable housing for the population and start approving building plans that show initiative with appreciation for resources and human beings.

 

 

The Internet and me, a work in progress.

Dumber

Does the internet make us stupid?

It seems quite hypocritical of me to write a blog which is anti Google.  To write anything and publish it on the internet for all to share and read while at the same time be full of doubt and worry and concern about whether it makes us stupid could make me stupid too?

 But I am genuinely worried.

 
Click Here

Is the capability of finding information at the click of a button  really the best way to run ones life?

 Who is Accountable?

The number one question has to be about trust.  Do you trust the information you are taken to?  Is it up to date?  Is it ethical?  Is it accountable?  Newspapers can be taken to Court for slander or liable if they do not report the truth.  They are accountable whatever you think of them, even the News of the World  or even South China Morning Post (actually I need to check that!).   But any old slapper can write an article and whack it up on a  website and pass it off as being true.  People can pretend to be someone else and actively try to hide their identity.  (My name IS Lesley Croft btw).

Close Your Lid

As a teacher of students who all have their own MacBook on their desk and have the capability of googling anything.  I suspect that they have all become completely addicted to their computers and are a bunch of slovenly layabouts who can't even do any thinking for themselves. The recent best seller by Nicholas Carr called The Shallows  suggests that the use of the internet is altering the way we think and we have become less able to digest large and complex amounts of information such as...books.  Are we now a world of 'slacktivists'.  More about Nicholas Carr

"Should we reintroduce the death penalty?" I ask my class in an attempt to spark a discussion where opinions will be flying around the room like electricity. (not meant to be a pun)

Then I find a student who has typed the question into google and sets about opening up the squillion results to find the right answer.  FGS (I'm not sure if that is a cool and hip acronym to write, like LOL, but For God's Sake comes natural to me so I feel it is worthy of a FGS).  Use your own brain I yell!  Close your lid!

Shirley Turkle has expressed much the same concerns in her book, Alone Together Why we Expect more from Technology and Less from Each Other.  Because when it boils down to it using the powerful tool that is the internet via your lap top or your blackberry or your iphone is just you, in a room alone.  You/we/me enjoy the contact and communication and sense of sharing we can get through the power of the internet.  As humans we want to share and we get immense enjoyment out of sharing.  This must be true otherwise why would Facebook or Twitter or the capability to comment on any random YouTube video be so popular?   But would we enjoy it more or less if we had that face to face communication as easily. In this world of social networking just how sociable are we really?

Hello FB Friends!  Come to my party

So if I was in a real live room with all my real live friends on Facebook would I be so keen to like them or comment on their new hat or latest holiday snaps?  I predict there would be lots of moments of awkwardness, perhaps a few stifled yawns where the latest photos of their latest meal would get the better of me.  Would I really be able to show the same enthusiasm towards their beautiful wife on her birthday.  In the past those sentiments would only be shared in a personal birthday card which would stand on the sideboard.  Now everyone gets to read it!   I would struggle to remember names.  And there would be at least one full-on-punches-and-everything-thrown fight, quite a few slanging matches not to mention one or two intimate, yet flirtatious, conversations in a few dark corners.  And because all of these people are my friends I would be responsible for such an event and be the one who is blamed for the disaster that would be a party.

Those Where The Days

In my day when there was no internet or mobile phone or even a phone in the house.   What did I do?  I watched the three available channels on the telly, once they came on in the evening.  Before that I read as many Enid Blyton books as I could get my hands on.  I knocked on the doors of my friends to see if they wanted to come out to play.  All friends lived no more than 100 yards away.  When the local paper came I read that and found out what was happening in the area approximately of a 50 mile radius of where I lived.  For a change we would walk to the chip shop, sometimes we would have money to buy chips.  When I got older and could venture to Stockton to buy music I brought home 45rpm singles and played them on repeat with the arm back on the record player so I would learn them by heart (ask me to sing Puppy Love by Donny Osmond).

You know what, it was boring compared to the information sharing, movies, music and breaking news we have available to us now so perhaps this 'real world' that many hark back to is an illusion and just never really existed?  Being in a room alone with a computer seems much more attractive to being in a room alone with a Danset record player and a Donny Osmond 45.

 

What do you hate?

As I mature and develop into a much wiser human being (that just means I'm getting old) I now know there are things I just don't like.  At some point there will be things you only think you don't like but may not have actually tried them.  But as the years go by and more experiences are open to you, you have opportunities to try different things.  You can't like everything can you? 

By the process of elimination I now have a very definite list of things I don't like, dare I say, hate?

So here is my worst case scenario.

I am alone on a boat.

The toilet facilities involve squatting.

The only thing to eat is tinned tomatoes with brown sauce and piccalilli.

The tv remote has broken and the only programme I can watch is Extreme Makeoverr Home Edition.

I only have access to the South China Morning Post without the letters page and The Sun.

When not watching Extreme Makeover Home Edition and Sky News I have to play Monopoly.

The only beverage is espresso.

I am visited at night by a rat.

 I am visited occasionally by a rotweiler.

The sun is burning hot and I have no suncream or shade but my feet are in a cold draught all the time.

The only decoration on the boat is a picture of Hello Kitty.

I can listen to music but it is classical and jazz.

My clothes are all made from 100% polyester.

The only cooling device is a ceiling fan.

I have long hair.

Sometimes I am allowed off the boat, say if the water is too calm so I actually stop feeling sea sick, and taken on a trip where I visit a dried fish and tofu shop.

I am made to join a prayer circle.

So what makes you sick, what makes your skin crawl, what brings you out in a cold sweat?

  

More names

I know it’s juvenile but these street signs bring a smirk to my lips every time I see them.  They are actual signs in Sai Kung, the town where I live, here in Honking Konkers.  There are more examples of this and I will get the photographs to prove it very soon.  Fuk Yu Restaurant, Wank Kee Boat Yard, Yuk Kee Food Stories and Man Kee Noodle Shop.  Oh dear I have lived here for six years, you’d think I would have the maturity not to snigger when I see them?

I have to also add more names that were never meant for people as I have been made aware of more now.

Thank you Brian for Miss INNOCENT HORE.  A real person working for Zambian Airways.  This deserves a prize.

More from

Hong Kong

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Boss

Spinach

Twinkle

Pretty

Catalyst