Lesley in Hong Kong

The Future - what happened to it?

Space 1999

In the lead up to the year 2000, I was extremely disappointed that the shiny future I felt I'd been promised would not be ready.   There would be no flying cars or silver catsuits.  There would still be food, as opposed to nutrition-packed pills.   My formative years were filled with images on TV showing me the fabulous futuristic future.  The Jetsons and Space 1999 have a lot to answer for!

 

The year 2000 came and went - still no flying cars or silver catsuits.  I still had to peel carrots and wash-up. 

What will 2020 be like?

2020 will soon be here - I know, I'm shocked too -  That futuristic dream of how science and technology would be so advanced it would be mundane, even domestic, is in tatters.    I dreamt that by the time I reached 2020 (fingers crossed)we would all be living in a peacefully perfect world where all conflicts had been forgotten.  I truly thought that the concept of working from home would be embraced by most people while the amount of leisure time would have been increased.  All folk would have terrifically stimulating hobbies that meant they bonded with others in a warm and comradery way.  No one would need to make the tea because a robot would deal with that, oh and everyone would fly around in their flying car or, even better, use The Transporter from Star Trek. 

In my imagined future, everyone would be warm enough or cool enough and technology would be able to supply all energy for free as that is just a human right.  If we want to keep the world populated then heat and light is a given.  Surely no one needs to profit from that? 

We have spoilt it

But it seems that we have spoilt the future for ourselves in an attempt to make convenience king.  The convenience of buying fresh food has become a multimillion-dollar industry involving factory farming and air transportation for lettuce.  The fast-food industry has fueled our craving for instant gratification so we can now walk around eating and drinking, then dump the plastic containers on the street.  There is now more plastic in the ocean than fish and more landfills than forest.  

Inconvenience should be king

Right now there is a riot going on in my neighbourhood and the conflict seems to have no resolution.  That is tragic enough.  But the most important issue is the unsustainability of our lifestyle.  The future I used to think was possible, those flying cars and silver catsuits, is as far away as the concept of peace in our time because the reality of the future, the air we breathe and the water we drink is filled with pollution created by the craving for convenience we thought we wanted.  

Our future is not one where science and technology make everything convenient.  If we do have a planet to live on, we will have to get used living a much simpler life where inconvenience is king because it is the only sustainable way to keep the population going.  Instead of that flying car, I imagine if I can't get anywhere by walking then I won't be going.  I still fancy that silver cat-suit though... 

 

Hong Kong has a monumental waste problem. (BBC Future)

Weekend in Shanghai

Chen Yi, the first communist mayor of Shanghai

I have to admit to being not very well travelled when it comes to China.  I have lived in SAR for nearly ten years now but have been some how magnetically repelled from the mainland because of the horror stories I hear on a daily basis about:-

• dirty toilets
• dirty air
• dirty streets
• dirty trains

Then there is the danger angle people like to thrap on about:-

• risk of earthquake
• risk of flood

Not to mention the general physical risks of:-

• being robbed
• being in a car accident
• being swindled

Taking my life in my hands I visited Shanghai, China's most populous city to find it was none of those things and whats more I had a great time and came back all in one piece.  I enjoyed it, I felt safe and I would go back.

ART

There is lots of art to see and the first stop was Shanghai Museum of Art situated next to the People's Park.  At the moment there is an exhibition of American Print Makers and we saw famous pieces by Jasper John's and Jim Dine.  After that we headed for 50 Moganshan Road which is a higgledy piggledy complex of converted warehouses filled with a vast variety of contemporary art.  Hundreds of visitors are attracted to this area every day and as well as the art there are trendy cafes and coffee to be had.  There is also the Museum of Modern Art, a state of the art glass building inside the People's Park but at the moment it just has a cafe inside - no art.

Pervert taking photograph of young girl's legs

 

THE PEOPLE'S PARK

The People's Park itself is a myriad of life.  A well looked after garden plus a few small theme park rides, it attracts a variety of people.  Sit on the grass and enjoy your picnic.  Practise tai chi to your hearts content.  Dress up in a panda outfit and thrill the children.  Advertise your unmarried grown up children being available for marriage (there was loads of that).  Play chess.  Beg.  Stop bewildered tourists and ask them questions to practise your English then offer to take them to a tea ceremony (we had that lots of times). All very friendly and non threatening.  I was even protected from a particularly annoying beggar in the park by some Shanghai people who felt the need to keep me safe and send her on her way.  They then translated what they had said for me which was basically 'get a job and stop bothering the tourist's!

Weeeee!

WANTED - GROOM FOR MY DAUGHTER

 

NANJING ROAD

Upon arrival on Nanjing Road pedestrian street the hawkers selling copy everythingyoucanthinkof pounced but being used to it on Nathan Road the usual technique of eyes front and ignore was implemented.  Although I wasn't quite ready for the wheelie shoe sellers who zipped about on a type of roller skate wheel that can be attached to any shoe.  They obviously felt that I was in the market for wheelie shoes but I politely declined, at first, after the 8th person zipping up to me on their trendy wheels I had had enough.  That's when Fairy Land Foot Massage lit its beacon and led me up their wonderful staircase to wonderfulness.  See previous blog.

Fairyland Foot Massage, Shanghai

THE BUND

In the evening, after one of the most delicious and interesting meals of my life at Lost Heaven.  See previous blog. 

Lost Heaven

We did The Bund.  The most famous area by the river lined with magnificent historic stone built structures dating back to a time when the west had a strong influence on the city.  On The Bund side of the river are the neo classical and art deco style buildings while across the river are the futuristic modern buildings all lit up and pretty.  Having said that it was Earth Hour when we arrived which meant that most of the lights had been switched off for an hour so the impact of them all coming on again at 9.30pm was thrilling, albeit not environmentally that friendly!

JAZZ IN SHANGHAI

On The Bund is the Peace Hotel which contains a very cool jazz club.  We look our positions on high stools at the bar and enjoyed the band.  Wow!  Excellent live music.  I didn't enjoy the cigarette smoke quite so much and it was a surprise to be in a bar full of smoke these days.  There is talk that China will ban smoking in public places very soon.  Let's wait to see how it goes?  A bit more jazz after the Peace Hotel involved a taxi ride to JZ Jazz Bar, 46 Fuxing Road, near Yongfu Road which was, again filled with smoke, and a zillion more people.  It is Shanghai's hippest jazz club.  After a difficult attempt at trying to get close to the stage and being told we had to pay 500 RMB for the privilege, we moved back to the free seating and let the jazz wash over us.  Yeh daddio!

OLD SHANGHAI AND YU GARDENS

Next morning more exploring was on the itineray and a visit to Yu Gardens and Old Shanghai.  It was crowed.  Very crowded.  But very exciting and filled with atmosphere and tourists being lead around by ladies in red caps and the dreaded electric megaphone.  Oh dear!  The buildings and temples were stunning and food stalls overwhelming.  We made our way out of the more crowded tourist shuffle area down some back streets where the real people lived and enjoyed a lunch which was cooked for us as we watched.  There were ceramic dishes already prepared with the ingredients, vegetables, fish or meat or just a veggie options with noodles or rice.  Once you choose your dish it was placed over a gas flame until it bubbled and cooked everything.  I think it was the original Pot Noodle.

So I wasn't in any danger as far as I know and I now know the horror stories are just that - stories.  There was even a Marks & Spencers with a sale on with a great coat just wating for me!

 

MORE PHOTOS WILL BE POSTED SHORTLY

 

Strawberry Picking - Hong Kong

Here I am snipping the strawberries

 

http://yl.com.hk/sbg/index.html

 

STRAWBERRY PICKING - SHA TAU KOK ROAD

Today I picked about 5lbs of strawberries on a pick-your-own-farm up towards Fanling in the New Territories.  In fact it's almost in China and there is the border with a policeman and a big sign saying Permit Holders Only'.  There is a big Buddhist temple on the right of Sha Tau Kok Road with many people burning paper offerings to their ancestors, some quite nice gardens with some carp swimming about although it could do with a clean and general prune.  One Buddhist temple is much like any other round these parts but this one has stalls with dried and fresh produce for sale.  The added bonus is the strawberry picking field.

My punnet (see below) cost $140 and right now I am making jam!

I would never have believed it possible but its really true.  It is strawberry picking for softies in that the plants are grown on plastic sheeting so no need to get any dirty soil on your Guccis plus they provide a handy pair of kiddie scissors for snipping the stalks.

 

A basket full of strawberries    $140 please

 As well as that I have now made organic carrot and corriander soup.  It's all good.

BREAKING NEWS - JAM IN JARS

Extra bonus addition to this blog - it is now Tuesday 5th April and the jam is now in jars.

The first attempt resulted in 4 jars of jam but it didn't set.  So I put two jars back in the pan, added apple skin and boiled for longer.  This resulted in set jam but it reduced down to only one jar.  It is yummy but in no way economical. 

Fairyland - Foot Massage and Hard Skin Removal - Shanghai

 

Feet

SOOTHING MASSAGE

After a tremendous amount of walking around Shanghai one Saturday on a weekend mini break our feet were throbbing and in need of some attention.  We didn't plan to visit Fairyland Health and Beauty on Nanjing Pedestrian Street, it seemed to find us.  I think it had a magnetic charm that lulled us up the stairs into completely unknown territory.  There was a short period of uncertainty until I was sure it was a respectable establishment because its just awful when it's not, don't you just hate it when that happens?

RELAXING MUSIC

In the blink of an eye we were made comfortable in a darkened room with relaxing music and our feet were soaked in fragrant water while the masseurs paid our shoulders much need attention.  A special bonus of a shoulder rub just to make up the time while the feet are cleansed and softened up ready for the foot massage.

HARD SKIN REMOVAL

The massage was excellent and I would have no reservations in recommending Fairyland if you are ever in need of stress relief and are in Shanghai at the same time.  But actually the best bit was the hard skin removal service.  For an extra 48 RMB a specially skilled man was summoned into the room yielding a blade.  Or was it a scalpel or was it an incredibly sharp chisel?  As I say it was a darkened room so it was hard to tell.  But the hard skin removal master was well equipped to work on feet in a darkened room.  He was wearing a head torch.  I guess he had a been boy scout when he was younger so was always prepared.  He set to work with the chisel and with the lightest touch he managed to  shave off what looked like snow flakes from my feet.  The towel was soon covered and I caught the masseurs looking sideways at each other at the surprising amount of dead skin building up as he dutifully shaved my feet.

The service was excellent, shoulder, feet and shaving of said feet. We floated out.  Wow!

Hard skin removal man wearing head torch

The man in the head torch made Fairyland an extra special experience and I want him to come and live in our house.

Lost Heaven, Yunnan Folk Cuisine, Shanghai

Yunnan Folk Cuisine Restaurant

http://www.lostheaven.com.cn/

Situated on Ya'an Dong Road, Shanghai this truly wonderful restaurant uses the flavours and ingredients of the Mountain Mekong Region to produce a spectacular menu. The dishes are influenced by flavours from Tibet, Burma, Thailand and the Yunnan Province of China.  The layout and decor is visually stunning and so is the menu and so are the chairs and so are the photographs displayed around the walls showing breathtaking images of the Yunnan area taken by David Hartung.  His photographs are also featured on the website if you care to check it out (Gallery).  But the nitty gritty of any restaurant, regardless of its lovely chairs and interesting toilets, is the food.  What does it taste like? 

I'll tell you. 

BEST FOOD EVER

At Lost Heaven I ate some of the best food I have ever had in my life.  It sounds like hyperbole and exaggeration doesn't it?  I really mean it.  I am being honest about the flavours.  So different, so refreshing and so scrumptious. 

The Yunnan Wild Vegetable Cakes (SEE PICTURE) served with a tomato relish were simple, beautiful. I enjoyed the chicken with seven spices as well as the mixed vegetables in a tamarind sauce.  The Crispy Pork was crispy, it was crackingly delicious.  The Tea Leaf Salad, a speciality dish from Burma, was the best dish which consisted of finely chopped, freshly picked tea leaf tips with a mixture of dried broad beans, peanuts and other yummy stuff.  I really don't know exactly what was in it I just know I needed to eat more of it. 

Lost Heaven gets a huge thumbs up from me.  When in Shanghai - go there.

Beautiful decor

The Hong Kong Literary Festival 2011 Benjamin Zephaniah

 

Benjamin Zephaniah

AN AUDIENCE WITH BEN PLUS HUNDREDS OF CHILDREN

In previous years I have seen authors talk about how they write and what they do to produce a book worthy of publication.  I am always interested in such a process having got to chapter seven of my own masterpiece but, so far, cannot find the wherewithal to continue to the end.  Authors sit in rooms with computers and write.  They usually work alone and so for the majority being in front of a large audience is not a natural environment.  Some can talk and be interesting, some can tell a story as well as write it, the opposite is sometimes, unfortunately true.  Some are not interesting and can't tell a story apart from when they are in their own room silently producing the written word.

A MAN OF MANY TALENTS

Benjamin Zephaniah is not soley a writer.  He is a performer.  Having an audience with him (and a few hundred school children) at this years literary festival was a wonderful experience.  His poetry is funny and accessable with a serious message.

I used to think nurses were women

I used to think police were all men

I used to think poets were boring

until I became one of them

 

You see what I mean?  Four lines, quite simple and straight forward but worthy of an analytical essay about the deeper meaning relating to feminism, class and stereotypical judgements in a post colonial voice.

A FUNNY MAN WITH A SERIOUS MESSAGE

Zephaniah is funny.  He doesn't take himself seriously but he does take the world seriously.  His work carries a message about equality and justice for all, including turkeys.  He talks of racism and sexism and even vegatarinism.  The children were more than satisfied by his answers to their questions about what kind of car he drives to his twin sister's name and he deflected any questions about his dreadlocks, obviously he gets that a lot!

At 53 he is looking good.  I wonder if its being a rasta, being a vegan or being a kung fu expert?

BENJAMIN ZEPHANIAH  OBE?

He was awarded an OBE but declined to accept it.  Here is the poem about that time.

 

Smart big awards and prize money
Is killing off black poetry
It's not censors or dictators that are cutting up our art.
The lure of meeting royalty
And touching high society
Is damping creativity and eating at our heart.

The ancestors would turn in graves
Those poor black folk that once were slaves would wonder
How our souls were sold
And check our strategies,
The empire strikes back and waves
Tamed warriors bow on parades
When they have done what they've been told
They get their OBE's.

Don't take my word, go check the verse
Cause every laureate gets worse
A family that you cannot fault as muse will mess your mind,
And yeah, you may fatten your purse
And surely they will check you first when subjects need to be amused
With paid for prose and rhymes.

Take your prize, now write more,
Faster,
Fuck the truth
Now you're an actor do not fault your benefactor
Write, publish and review,
You look like a dreadlocks Rasta,
You look like a ghetto blaster,
But you can't diss your paymaster
And bite the hand that feeds you.

What happened to the verse of fire
Cursing cool the empire
What happened to the soul rebel that Marley had in mind,
This bloodstained, stolen empire rewards you and you conspire,
(Yes Marley said that time will tell)
Now look they've gone and joined.

We keep getting this beating
It's bad history repeating
It reminds me of those capitalists that say
'Look you have a choice,'
It's sick and self-defeating if our dispossessed keep weeping
And we give these awards meaning
But we end up with no voice.

 

 

 

Driving the Hong Kong way

Chaos on Hong Kong roads

EXPERIECED DRIVER

I successfully passed my driving test, first time, over 25 years ago and, therefore, have been a qualified driver since that point.  Apart from my stint in the Magic Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, when I wasn't allowed to drive due to my feminine demeanor (it's true), I have been driving various vehicles on various roads since then.  I have negotiated the steep, narrow country lanes of West Yorkshire when I built up my left bicep doing scary hill starts.   I have managed snow and ice driving.  I have bumped across the desert and stopped on the motorway for camels in Bahrain where I saw enough accidents to last a life time.  I have delivered my children to parties in unknown streets and picked them up again as well as skilfully managing fastening child seats, serving Tommy tippee cups and chopped apple, singing along to child friendly music WHILE driving. 

All of this evidence means that I am a driver with experience.

GEOGRAPHY HURDLE

However, since arriving in Hong Kong I have regressed.  Even the break neck speed and reckless Arabic  driving style did not prepare me for Hong Kong roads.   My main hurdle is geography.  Even after being here a considerable amount of time, understanding the road signs seems to rely on the power of telepathy.  Although there are signs to,say,  Kwun Tong, how do you know when you've got to Kwun Tong?  There is no sign to tell you and everything looks the same and there are no spaces in-between areas.  It's all just one huge metropolis.  How can you tell if you have left Jordan and are in Prince Edward or Mong Kok?  What's the blooming difference?

Parking is prohibitively expensive and don't talk to me about tunnel fees.  Then there is the lack of understanding regarding the rules of roundabout use.

FRIENDLY WAVE IS EXPECTED

But its the complete lack of courtesy that is the most difficult to deal with.   I am programmed to queue and am hard wired to be a polite road user.  I am English after all.  So if someone in front is signalling to change lanes then it is protocol, in England anyway, to allow that person to manoeuvre in front of your car and you, as a sensible, polite and intelligent driver, to give him/her space to do that.  It is then quite normal, no expected, that a friendly wave to acknowledge this politeness is executed. 

EYES FRONT AND IGNORE

Hong Kong drivers seem blissfully unaware that other drivers need to change lanes at all and will, eyes front, continue to drive at the same speed, ignore your signal and even speed up to fill the gap so there is no chance of a safe manoeuvre causing you to drive to somewhere you don't even know and never wanted to go to in the first place.  Then they have the nerve to beep their horn!  This can also be done while queuing for tunnels.  Everyone is crawling along.  Eye contact, friendly nods or acknowledgment of the presence of other drivers can easily be made, but it never is.  No weakness must be shown.  Any attempt at lane changing at the tunnels is a serious chess move which, surprise surprise causes check mate regularly.  If no one will let anyone else in where are we all going? 

There is no courtesy on Hong Kong roads.

DOG EAT DOG

Is this dog eat dog attitude an indication of the real nature of Hong Kong people?  Perhaps their obsession with making money is the same attitude that is otherwise only exposed when they get behind the wheel of a car and their polite persona in other areas is merely a front, hiding the real cut throat 'I come first' stance?

Steamers Sai Kung

NEW IMPROVED MENU

Steamers is a Sai Kung institution.  I highly recommend it.  The staff are friendly and helpful and the food is delicious.  They do a great curry as well as other gems from their, mostly, western menu.  On Sundays it is an excellent choice of venue for a roast dinner which includes Yorkshire pudding.  You get a huge pile of meat (beef, chicken or lamb) lashing of gravy and lots of veggies for under $100.  Then there is their Full English Breakfast which is everything you'd expect and includes tea and toast.  There is really more than you can eat (personal opinion obviously). 

ALFRESCO DINING

The atmosphere changes depending on the time of day.  It can be a quiet and peaceful place for breakfast or it can be full of sports fans enjoying the game and getting very vocal.  The best thing about Steamers is the private court yard outside where you can sit and enjoy that fresh Sai Kung air (everything is just peachy in Sai Kung, don't listen to the API index!) and do a spot of people watching to your hearts content.

Steamers,66 Yi Chun St, Sai Kung, tel 2792 6991.

Live Earth

So what should we all do?

The message is coming at me every day. I am a bad person. I have polluted the planet with my electric light bulb use, my foreign holidays and my need to buy food with over enthusiastic wrapping so now I am going to pay for my heinous crimes by either drowning in a flood or sizzling like a big pink sausage until I explode from over heating and it’ll be no ones fault but mine. As an individual I am responsible for the state of the planet but I changed my light bulbs, didn’t fly anywhere during my last holiday and have refused loads of plastic bags in the supermarket lately (except when I forget to take my own bag!)but still I am getting messages that polar bears are drowning due to the lack of ice to live on in the Arctic, people have drowned on the streets of Sheffield in severe floods and landfill sites in Hong Kong are still filling up faster than a speeding bullet. My individual effort didn’t do diddly squat.

Now this message is coming at you as well as me so don’t try and hide from it. I read the same papers as you do, I watched the Inconvenient Truth the same as you did and I have watched the same news reports as you did. So I have to come to the conclusion that it is YOU who is the bad person and not me.

This must be a true and indisputable fact because I have done what they said and nothing changed so I just have to assume that other people just do not have the same level of social conscious as me. Come on – spill – have you been as environmentally friendly as you could have? Search deep inside yourself and answer truthfully because if the answer is no then its your fault that the pollution in Hong Kong is causing more and more respiratory diseases, that the world wide UV index figures are rising because of the thinning ozone layer and that 90% of wastewater in developing countries is discharged into rivers and streams without any treatment.

How guilty do you feel now?

Never worry gentle reader we are about to be saved. This weekend in New York, London, Johannesburg, Rio De Janeiro, Shanghai, Tokyo, Sydney and Hamburg some singers and bands are getting together to sing some songs. Live Earth has come to save us all. Praise be I say. It never occurred to me that by flying a lot of rich rock stars first class to various cities, using hundreds of kilowatts of power to light their stages and power their PA systems and lighting while broadcasting the proceedings all around the globe that we could reverse the effects of our massive carbon footprint (I just had to use that phrase didn’t I, you are nobody if you don’t say it these days) on our sick planet and by the end of it the skies over Hong Kong will be clear and bright and all the polar bears will be happy on their ice flow once again.

It is truly heart warming to know that as well as those nice rock star chaps that the other partners http://www.liveearth.org/partners.php
in the Live Earth event are Phillips, Pepsi and Absolut Vodka, gosh I am so touched by their dedication to gaining a cleaner environment for us all, aren’t you?

Listen up – I have an idea! Let’s all burn our cars, wait a minute that will cause far too much carbon, OK no, let’s all leave our cars at home and turn them into greenhouses and get a horse. What about it? Are you in? So we return to the days of no motor cars and so no pollution in the atmosphere. As we all ride along the road people will come out from their homes with shovels and pick up the horse s##t for their greenhouses which used to be their car and life will be sweet.

But wait. If we all had a horse that would be 7 billion horses and think of the horse sh##t that would produce. We’d be up to our necks in the stuff and wouldn’t give a bugger about what we were growing in the greenhouse then because we’d choke on the methane. Back to the drawing board.