Lesley in Hong Kong

Ear phones - are they the curse of the young?

It is with great trepidation that I want to start this blog with "When I was young" because the sub-text reads "I am old now". Perhaps it's not about age, perhaps its about technological advances, which have been vast over the last 48 years?  Such changes make the way things were and the way things are now result in making me feel wise and experienced. See how I steered that away from using the 'old' word there? I am talking specifically about the way I listened to music and was introduced to new music because it is so very different to the way that happens now.

Music Centre

When I was growing up in my house we had a television and a record player in the living room, a radio in the kitchen and when I got to be about 14 I had a portable record player in my bedroom which sat on the floor. The living room was where the records, 45s and LPs, were kept in a special stacking unit under the teak display cabinet next to the telly which had 3 channels. The only progress I remember was when we got a colour telly which meant we could watch Play Days on BBC2 in colour. We also got a music centre which meant we could play the radio, cassette tapes and records on the same piece of equipment. All of these music playing machines were kept in the same corner of the living room.

 

Parent's Music Taste

The way music was played back then meant that everyone in the family got to hear your choice of music. My mother liked John Denver and my dad liked Irish folk music. When they put their records on I listened to the tracks. I learned the words of many songs just because they were being played in the background while I went about my business. When I played my records they listened to my choice. When I was deeply involved with Donny Osmond's Puppy Love and played it loud enough so I could hear it in the garden (with the arm across so it repeated) there was a few tuts but I continued to listen and so did they. When my brother was all consumed with Steve Harley and Cockney Rebel and what became a life long love of punk I also became knowledgeable about punk music even though I only owned The Osmonds and David Essex LPs.

 

Top of the Pops - BBC Radio 1

Then there was Top of the Pops and Radio 1.  That was the way I heard new music and decided if I liked it enough to buy it.   The new number one was announced on a Sunday and I would listen for hours to ensure that I knew who it was so I would be all knowledgeable on a Monday morning at school.  And then on Thursdays that number one song would be the last to be played on TOTP. 

There was a time when me and my brother would attempt to use our small cassette player to record music from the telly.  This meant standing by until the disc jockey had announced the band (sometims that would be Jimmy Saville) and then pressing record and play simultaniously and then, most importantly, remain totally silent until it had finished thereupon jumping up to press 'stop' so as not to get Jimmy or Tony or Dave or Noel's voice on the recording. 

I remember this proving really difficult during Sugar Baby Love by the Rubetts because the lead voice was so incredibly high it made us convulse into fits of laughter and have to go in the kitchen until that bit was over. 

Purchasing Music

Based upon my exposure to music via Top of the Pops or Radio 1 I would decide whether I liked a song enough to buy the single and then if I really liked the artist whether to go the full distance and buy their LP, which would have tracks on both sides, that I'd never ever heard and was taking a huge risk shelling out my hard earned Saturday girl money for.

When I got home and put the record on everyone else got to hear it.  I took it rounds my friend's house sometimes so they could hear it too. 

New Way

These days the way I listen to music and find out about new music is completely different.  It is hardly ever from the television and when I listen to the radio I do it through a podcast of various BBC shows and for copyright reasons I can only listen to the voice of the DJ, the music is not available.  The people around me do not pollute my space with their music.  That would be rude.

They play their own personal music through earphones into their brain.  So my question is how do we know about other people's music and new music?  I feel my music education happened because I had to listen to the music of others and be exposed to various different tastes.  I had to listen to music I didn't particularly like so as to get to the stuff I did like.

Now it is possible to only buy selected tracks from albums which I think is a real shame because when you have a whole album you start off liking some tracks and then you might warm to the others over time.  But if you never gave yourself the chance in the first place and only bought a few tracks then you could be missing out?

Earphone benefits?

Earphone wearing has its benefits - I understand that.  But as we all go about our business listening to our own personal music through earphones we may fail to be exposed to music of different eras and genres because although the range of music available to illegally download via You Tube is vast, I suspect only a small amount is explored because it seems that the same narrow range music is being listened to all over the globe in the same way as T-shirts and jeans are the most common choice of dress all over the world. 

There are homes all over the world where 3 or 4 people may inhabit the same living space but no one plays their music out loud into the room,  they all listen to their own private music pumped into their ears via earphones and thus depriving the rest of the household from saying 'turn that bloody noise down' or even better 'is that a girl or a bloke singing that?"

Children can be sucked into their own You Tube Itunes world and never know the musical taste of their parents, never have to suffer their parents Radio 2 choice of music, never know all the words to American Pie and never have the opportunity to get to know where the original track came from.

 

 

Competitive Cooking

Each day I need to eat a meal. I manage this reasonably well and can cook food to keep myself and my family healthy with the added bonus of it being tasty and enjoyable to eat.  I shop for food, put the food away once its brought home, cook the food at the right time in order to have the food at the right temperature at the designated meal time.  After that the washing up needs to be done, the crockery and cutlery put away and then the process is repeated at the next meal time.

Its a basic routine that occurs otherwise we'd all be hungry.

No medals

It is not really that hard, I have not been given nor do I expect, any gold medals for this function.   I have not been abused or lost my temper and stormed out during a tricky grilling technique and so far I have had no exciting soundtrack to heighten my mood to cause anxiety and tension, while rolling out a pie topping.

While going through the various processes of peeling or chopping vegetables I have not waved a knife around with a flourish to draw attention to myself because when it comes down to it, chopping a vegetable, particularly an onion, is quite a mundane thing.

the wrong way?

Chopping Onions Must Stop

So if I see one more celebrity bloody chef on the telly demonstrating how to chop a bloody onion AGAIN I will ... I will... I will... probably switch channels.  But I really want them to just stop being so patronising in their attitude towards cooking and to put an absolute halt on the close-up filming of chopping onions, sharpening knives in a menacing way, as if they are related to Anthony Hopkins, and most of all stop, just please stop, with the competitive element of cooking meals.

There are thousands of people out there who have to trudge around supermarkets to keep the food stocks in their home.  Those same people have to produce meals for different age groups and different tastes to keep everyone happy every day.  They do not get a medal or even a round of applause, probably just hurty red marks cut into their hands from carrying heavy bags home from the shop. 

Then they sit down for a relaxing hour our two before bedtime to be confronted with horrific competitive cooking television programmes like Come Dine with Me, Masterchef or Iron Chef where quite incredibly cooking a meal is manipulated into being something of an Olympic sport where the response can be highly critical reducing participants to tears when a very polite (if you were brought up proper)  'Thank you for my tea, please can I leave the table" is the only correct response, the request will be granted and then everyone can get on with the other, more important, stuff they have to do, usually not cooking.

PS When I say I want celebrity chefs to go away I didn't mean all of them, particularl Curtis Stone, he's nice!

Curtis Stone

 

Italian Vogue - Curvy Feature

 

In the June edition of Italian Vogue they have featured curvy women which means they have snubbed the thin models usually used to hang clothes on and chosen women with actual hips and breasts.   They are truly beautiful and sexy, the fact is they are human shaped, in fact, the shots are incredibly stunning and well worth a peek.

 

Belle Vere - Vogue.it

 

 

America's Next Top Model - the wrong message

Tyra Banks, with her gang of bullies and misogynists,  orchestrate misery and unhappiness for the benefit of their viewing figures week by week.  Through cleverly manipulating young women into believing that it is mandatory to carry out tasks that are painful or frightening means that they have what it takes to be a top model.  According to the America's Next Top Model mantra - suffering is what it takes.

Photoshoot Hissy Fit

By pressurizing the contestants into attending photo shoots where at least one girl from the group is extremely uncomfortable, afraid or just looks plain stupid means that at least two of them will have a hysterical moment and cry, thus making her mascara run down her doll-like make-up clad face.

Save it for later

The incident will later be referred to while the review of the days shooting takes place.  Whatever the circumstances it is ALWAYS the constestants fault.  She is always made to feel like she was 100% in the wrong and was completely out of order to complain about the situation on the day.  There is never any question that, in fact, the girl was being badly treated or being asked to do something against her better judgement or beliefs. 

It appears that to work in the model industry and be successful you have to do exactly what you told and never object or open her mouth to express her opinion in any way. 

The wrong message

This is my objection to the message of the programme.   It is the wrong message.  If the contestants, or in fact, any woman, is in a situation where it is her body that is her assest then surely it is her who should be solely in charge of what she feels comfortable doing with it.

If she is asked to dangle from a hideously high building or snuggle up next to a farm animal and she doesn't like that then she needs to speak up and say 'No'.  It is indicative of the modelling industry to portray sickly looking emaciated girls as being beautiful and so this look has become something hundreds of women have begun to believe is the desired and most attractive way to be.  Again a wrong message.

Say NO!

It is doubly wrong to portray the models being bossed around in circumstances where they have no control over what they can or cannot do during their or photo sessions with so called professional people. 

Is it pimping?

The girls should be empowered into believing that if they do not feel comfortable in a situation then they need not go through it, they can and should say no.  Without this power is is merely exploitation, nothing more than pimping.

Digital Methods

 

While the photo shoot is in full swing the photographer, who is operating  expenisve and highly technological equipment, can see the results on a monitor.  By the power of digital photography the image can be viewed instantly.  There is no dark room hit-or-miss developing to take place, no opening the back of the camera by mistake and letting light in or forgetting to put a film in the camera - those days are gone.  A simple memory stick and a computer ensures the result is on view.

Too what?

Then how on earth can Tyra and her mean gang have each girl stand, exposed and vulnerable, in front of the panel to be shown their 'best' photo and it be the responsibility of the model whether it is an acceptable photograph for the purposes of fashion magazines - or the other one - whether it is horrible.   So often the girls are personally critisized for a bad photograph "Your neck looks too short"  "Your leg looks odd"  "Your arm is droopy" .  Well why did'nt the photographer with the plethora of fancy equipment tell her that at the time.  He is the one who is looking down the lens and he is the one who is looking at the monitor at the instant result.  Could he not ask her to move her neck, leg or arm at the time instead of saving up the faulty work to use it for humiliation and belittlement later on?

So America's Next Top Exploited Young Girl get a grip of yourself and don't let Tyra and her gang push you around - speak up for yourself and say no especially if they suggest dying your hair white blonde when you are naturally a brunette or having your head shaved when you've spent years growing your hair.

I am a fan of Speedos

 

I'm Sexy and I know it

I will say it again.  I am a fan of Speedos.  I said it in an earlier blog Speedos My confession

and I think this video truly confirms why I am right!

 

 

 

 

 

The Internet and me, a work in progress.

Dumber

Does the internet make us stupid?

It seems quite hypocritical of me to write a blog which is anti Google.  To write anything and publish it on the internet for all to share and read while at the same time be full of doubt and worry and concern about whether it makes us stupid could make me stupid too?

 But I am genuinely worried.

 
Click Here

Is the capability of finding information at the click of a button  really the best way to run ones life?

 Who is Accountable?

The number one question has to be about trust.  Do you trust the information you are taken to?  Is it up to date?  Is it ethical?  Is it accountable?  Newspapers can be taken to Court for slander or liable if they do not report the truth.  They are accountable whatever you think of them, even the News of the World  or even South China Morning Post (actually I need to check that!).   But any old slapper can write an article and whack it up on a  website and pass it off as being true.  People can pretend to be someone else and actively try to hide their identity.  (My name IS Lesley Croft btw).

Close Your Lid

As a teacher of students who all have their own MacBook on their desk and have the capability of googling anything.  I suspect that they have all become completely addicted to their computers and are a bunch of slovenly layabouts who can't even do any thinking for themselves. The recent best seller by Nicholas Carr called The Shallows  suggests that the use of the internet is altering the way we think and we have become less able to digest large and complex amounts of information such as...books.  Are we now a world of 'slacktivists'.  More about Nicholas Carr

"Should we reintroduce the death penalty?" I ask my class in an attempt to spark a discussion where opinions will be flying around the room like electricity. (not meant to be a pun)

Then I find a student who has typed the question into google and sets about opening up the squillion results to find the right answer.  FGS (I'm not sure if that is a cool and hip acronym to write, like LOL, but For God's Sake comes natural to me so I feel it is worthy of a FGS).  Use your own brain I yell!  Close your lid!

Shirley Turkle has expressed much the same concerns in her book, Alone Together Why we Expect more from Technology and Less from Each Other.  Because when it boils down to it using the powerful tool that is the internet via your lap top or your blackberry or your iphone is just you, in a room alone.  You/we/me enjoy the contact and communication and sense of sharing we can get through the power of the internet.  As humans we want to share and we get immense enjoyment out of sharing.  This must be true otherwise why would Facebook or Twitter or the capability to comment on any random YouTube video be so popular?   But would we enjoy it more or less if we had that face to face communication as easily. In this world of social networking just how sociable are we really?

Hello FB Friends!  Come to my party

So if I was in a real live room with all my real live friends on Facebook would I be so keen to like them or comment on their new hat or latest holiday snaps?  I predict there would be lots of moments of awkwardness, perhaps a few stifled yawns where the latest photos of their latest meal would get the better of me.  Would I really be able to show the same enthusiasm towards their beautiful wife on her birthday.  In the past those sentiments would only be shared in a personal birthday card which would stand on the sideboard.  Now everyone gets to read it!   I would struggle to remember names.  And there would be at least one full-on-punches-and-everything-thrown fight, quite a few slanging matches not to mention one or two intimate, yet flirtatious, conversations in a few dark corners.  And because all of these people are my friends I would be responsible for such an event and be the one who is blamed for the disaster that would be a party.

Those Where The Days

In my day when there was no internet or mobile phone or even a phone in the house.   What did I do?  I watched the three available channels on the telly, once they came on in the evening.  Before that I read as many Enid Blyton books as I could get my hands on.  I knocked on the doors of my friends to see if they wanted to come out to play.  All friends lived no more than 100 yards away.  When the local paper came I read that and found out what was happening in the area approximately of a 50 mile radius of where I lived.  For a change we would walk to the chip shop, sometimes we would have money to buy chips.  When I got older and could venture to Stockton to buy music I brought home 45rpm singles and played them on repeat with the arm back on the record player so I would learn them by heart (ask me to sing Puppy Love by Donny Osmond).

You know what, it was boring compared to the information sharing, movies, music and breaking news we have available to us now so perhaps this 'real world' that many hark back to is an illusion and just never really existed?  Being in a room alone with a computer seems much more attractive to being in a room alone with a Danset record player and a Donny Osmond 45.

 

Coronation Street

I have fallen off the wagon and am now back in the routine of watching Coronation Street on a week day daily basis.  I never thought it would catch me again having weened myself off it ten years ago.  But Granada TV is now a channel on offer on Now TV in Hong Kong with a 6.30am and a 6.30pm viewing every day.  On the weekend there is an omnibus edition on Sundays although I do avoid watching it then.  Oh! what am I saying?  I watch it then, sometimes, too!

Steve MacDonald

Quite a bit has changed over a decade and the Hong Kong viewing is about three years behind the real life happening now UK viewings.  But it doesn't matter a jot to me because I haven't seen anything.  Obviously I know there was a tram crash to mark the Ken Barlow 50th year in the longest running soap in the world, but I actually don't know who survived and who was snubbed out then.

So it doesn't matter.  I know I can google it all but what's the fun in that?  Plus it doesn't involve much concentration.  It is possible to peel potatoes, chop onions, answer the phone, shave legs or carry out other slightly more demanding intellectual activities such as writing blogs.

Liz MacDonald

So this is what is happening now, deep breath, brace yourself :-

Liz MacDonald is the landlady of the Rovers Return and is married to Vernon (not Jim so she is).  Steve lives in the Rovers with her and is with a smart woman who is the sister of Liam who is married to Maria who has just lost a baby and Liam's sister in law is Carla who is a widow so Liam's brother died (don't ask) and she lives with a Scottish bloke who works away and is rich so while he's away Carla flirts madly with Liam and it drives Maria bonkers.  Now Maria is staying with Audrey who has just been in contact with Gail's dad after 50 years and he didn't even know he had a daughter and was well upset and now Gail wants to get in touch but Audrey is not bothered although it upsets Bill who she lives with.  David is in jail for pushing his mother, Gail, down the stairs and she has forgiven him but why lord only knows and Sarah and Bethany are in Italy with the Canadian bloke who purports to be Gail's brother although how Audrey ever explained that one I don't know.  Roy is running Roy's Rolls and phones Hayley in Africa but I haven't worked out why she is there.

Roy Cropper

Our ever favourite Jack Duckworth is a widower, Vera has died. It was SO sad.  Now his stupid grandson Paul has set fire to Leanne Battersby's Italian restaurant on purpose for the insurance but then because Leanne would'nt be his girlfriend he has confessed to arson - stupid.  Although it seems like Leanne got away with it.  Jack is well pissed off with Paul who he says is his father's son (we all hated Terry).

Leanne Battersby

So that is a potted history of the story so far and you know it is of little consequence if you don't follow it or if you missed 10 years worth of programmes because you can soon pick it up and if you need a little background I can always fill you in and pre 2000 I consider myself a Platinum level expert in Corrie.

 

Patriotism

 

                                                                     It's just a little kiss

See the kiss on the balcony

Watching the Wedding Yesterday

Patriotism means, by definition, a devotion to ones country.  In accordance with said definition I am, therefore, not patriotic because I cannot say wholeheartedly that I am devoted to my country.  Being an expat in Hong Kong for 'n' amount of years could make others think I didn't care about England.  But they'd be wrong.  I am devoted and I am proud to be English. Yesterday I was glued to Theresa's telly all afternoon until the big moment of that kiss on that balcony and I truly truly enjoyed every minute of it.

The Royal Family

As the members of the British Royal Family made their way to Westminster Abbey and took their places, all behaving impeccably, it was obvious that they know how to put on a jolly good 'do'.  They have their pick of the best church, the best flowers, the best carriages and of course the world class top number one best route to the venue and then on to the reception. 

Queen Elizabeth I

But it's not just because they have one of the best driveways in the world to parade up and down (The Mall) its because of the crowds.  The public, who turned out to wave at them in the hope of getting a quick glimpse of the Royals really made that wedding day into an atmospheric event and made it historically important. 

Emotional Day

It is very emotional to watch any wedding.  The open exchange of vows and the support of both families is a marvelous and memorable event for any couple.  Its guaranteed to form a lump in ones throat.  Having the whole thing televised and broadcast around the world to over two billion people and having the route lined with thousands of enthusiastically waving people is mind blowing.  And it's that atmosphere of the gathering of a large crowd in celebration that gets my bottom lip quivering.  The emotion and overwhelming friendliness renews my patriotism and fuels my devotion to England.  All of those people, some had camped out for days, sitting and standing in the open and feeling secure establishes a trust in mankind.  People of all ages gathered together for the same purpose without fear. 

 

Crowds on The Mall

There goes my bottom lip goes again! 

Long may they reign over us

I have heard the press say that the moment the couple kissed on the balcony was the moment the British Royal Family re established themselves.  I think they are wrong.  The billions around the world who watched on screen and the thousands who made the journey to The Mall, Hyde Park and the streets lining the route from The Goring Hotel to Westminster Abbey and then on to Buckingham Palace didn't need that kiss.  Be sure they wanted to see it.  But the planning and excitement that was generated prior to the big day surely proves that Britain loves their Queen and that one day we will see King William and Princess Catherine. 

                                                                  Excellent idea!

Its a tradition that will continue  as it has for centuries and I for one am proud of it and I am patriotic. The less said about the Princesses stupid hats the better...

Oh dear!

 

William and Kate - Royal Wedding - 29th April, 2011

God Save the Queen.

The Official Site of The Royal Wedding

The wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton is on Friday.  Did you know?

It's at 11am british time so that makes it 6pm Hong Kong time.  How civilized.

I feel I am missing out on the celebrations and street parties because I am not in jolly old blighty.  I know I can watch wall to wall telly about 'how they met' 'who designed the dress' 'who is on the invitation list' 'how his parents met' (who were they?) etc etc but what I am missing out on is the cheap tat that will be inevitably be on sale in...I was going to say Woolworths, but that's long gone, so whatever the equivalent to Woolies is these days?  Probably ASDA or TESCO.

I am still mourning the breakage of the Charles and Diana mug that I bought 31 years ago although that drop may have been a freaky premonition.  Or just a smashed mug?

Here are some excellent examples of the William & Kate memoribilia - my personal favourite is the the William and Kate Fridge!

 

The Food for the reception

Is this the price of a stamp these days?

This beer has been created to celebrate the day.

Kiss me Kate

 Weird masks, balloons and plastic cups - everything you'll need for your street party

I am surprised I haven't seen for sale in Sai Kung.

bunting and flags

Condoms by appointment.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

   Well, if it was Prince Andrew it would be different.

 

Kate Middleton doll (could be full size with open mouth, not too sure)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My favourite - the fridge - a splendid addition to any modern kitchen

Knit your own Royal Wedding kit, corgis included - start now to be ready for the 29th!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is she really the girl next door?

  Love Hearts for those with a sweet tooth.

 

 

Totally chavvy nails.  A must for all slappers!

                                              Royal tea bags               Royal jigsaw puzzle

 

Top Shop Bunting Socks - a must for your big day William...

 

                                                              Isn't it K for Katherine?

This is just to remind me of the mug I smashed.

 

Another Year directed by Mike Leigh

THE MIKE LEIGH TECHNIQUE

I love the fact that Mike Leigh doesn't let the actors of his films have a script and the fact that he makes them develop the character themselves.  He sits them down and asks them a zillion questions about the character they will be, from what sort of breakfast did you eat as a child and how did you go to school to how you feel about your boss and how did you sleep last night.  Until the actor becomes the font of all knowledge for their character and will 'live' their character throughout their stint playing them.  Abigail's Party and Nuts in May are my favourites probably because Alison Steadman is in both of them.

BRITISH FILM IN HONG KONG

I look out for new work from Leigh and have been looking forward to seeing Another Year.  Eventually it came to Hong Kong after being released in the UK last year.  I am always keen to watch British films and adore the ordinariness of their portrayal of real life in all its mundane ways much more than the Hollywood razzmatazz. 

ANOTHER YEAR - REVIEW

World Exclusive Trailer - The Guardian

Another Year shows us the lives of Gerri and Tom, a middle-aged couple nearing retirement, and their year as the seasons change on their allotment.  Tom is a geologist and Gerri is a counsellor.  They are middle class and very comfortable in their cozy modern house and I want to tell you they have an Aga but I am not 100% sure, for arguments sake let's believe they do.  But the story is not really about them, its about their long  term friends Mary, a desperately sad and lonely woman who Gerri works with and Ken, Tom's old friend who is overweight and unhealthy with a potential drink problem.  The other character who is also taken into the kitchen (with Aga)  is Tom's brother who comes to stay after the death of his wife.

MARY

These three people are featured around the table of Gerri and Tom at various times during the year and their unhappiness is palpable. They are all in need of love and care at a time in their lives when none of them have a partner for various reasons.  Mary, in particular, is appealing to the couple for support and a slice of security in her shambolic life.  There is no doubt that Lesley Manville was utterly brilliant working in the Mike Leigh style and the audience can feel nothing but sympathy for her.

SUCH A REVOLTING COUPLE

I found the main characters of Tom and Gerri to be the most revolting  people.  They didn't entertain their friends, they merely  tolerated them.  They did not help them in any way apart  from feeding them and offering copious glasses of wine which was probably the last thing they needed.  Looking down their noses at their sad and lonely friends and just allowing them to get deeper into a  mire of self pity and mental health problems.   Gerri is the worst counsellor in the world and Tom has probably given up caring about his profession a long time ago given that retirement and more time on his allotment is looming. His sensitivity is actually cold and fake.

ORDINARILY BRITISH

It is a beautifully shot film and is British in its ordinariness, in a good way.  But I was so depressed at their lack of real care for their friends and I became more and more irritated by their superior stance of 'we are happy and you are not' attitude I wanted to take Mary and Ken and genuinely help them.  Really listen to their problems and really be supportive instead of a half arsed invitation for dinner during which nothing is really said and nothing is really changed.

 

 

Coronation Street - should I?

Mr & Mrs Barlow's front room                                        Bet Lynch  Annie Walker   Bettie Turpin

                                                                                     Bar maids at The Rovers Return

T

Stan and Hilda Ogden

 WORLD'S LONGEST RUNNING SOAP

It dominated my life.    I longed for the next hit.  I was emotionally attached to it.  Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays at 7.30pm were crucial times to be home.  I just had to.  I couldn't miss it. 

Obviously I am talking about Coronation Street.  The world's longest running, and best,  soap opera, it will be 50 years old in December this year.  James Roach has never had another job.  He has spent his working life being Ken Barlow. 

HUMAN CONDITION

I was totally loyal to The Street.  Nothing else would do.  I tried Eastenders and Emmerdale but they didn't have the same comedic lines.  They take themselves far too seriously while The Street has a tongue in cheek attitude with some light relief thrown in to make us realise that the whole cast and writers are in on a perfectly formed and long running joke about the human condition and the flaws we all have.  Once you get it you can be hooked.

I was addicted.

IRONIC DUCKS

I loved Stan and Hilda Ogdan's house with three pot ducks on their murial.  Hilda's curlers and Stan's back were consistent and essential props for many years which made Hilda's hilarious misunderstandings even funnier.  Bet Lynch (Julie Goodyear) was the ultimate caricature of a bar maid and an iconic landlady. Those animal prints and gigantic beehive were synonymous to the character because even though she was a hard faced woman we were given little hints of the real, vulnerable, Bet.  That's why we love her.

EMOTIONAL INVOLVEMENT

Of course there was Jack and Vera Duckworth almost on the same iconic level as Bet.  The ratings went through the roof when Vera died.  We all cried.  Ken and Deidre, who are still a couple after many twists and turns in their relationships, Rita Fairclough, Ena Sharples, Annie Walker, Kevin and Sally...oh lord the list goes on.

I have even been to Granada Studios in Manachester to visit the set.  I was moved to tears.  I sometimes use the Newton and Ridley coasters, but only on special occassions.

KICKED THE HABIT

But you see, gentle reader I kicked the habit.  I weened myself off it.  I broke away and convinced myself that life was better without it.  It was hard at first, painful sometimes, but I did it.  I hardly ever think about it these days (But I still own a Hilda Ogden t-shirt and have a framed photograph of Bet Lynch).  As an expat life, was difficult obtaining recordings but I had sources I could trust.  I would have Coronation Street binges involving hours and hours of back to back recordings on VHS to keep me up to date.  When that dried up I would read story lines on-line, that was before You Tube. 

IT DOMINATED MY LIFE

My state of mind changed.  I was ready to leave it behind and stop it dominating my life.  I still know the name of Ena Sharples' cat and can give you the previous husbands of Deidre and Rita but I just keep all that information locked away, quietly suppressed because, as I say, I have kicked the habit.

$28 MONTH IS NOTHING

But now.  Look what's happened?  Granada TV has arrived in Hong Kong as an option on NOW TV.  For a mere $28 a month I could watch Coronation Street again.  I could, if I wanted to, I could.  I have seen the adverts in the local press.  I have even pressed the yellow button for a free preview. 

RESIST

So far I have resisted tempation.  I consider myself strong enough to keep away from it but it might be just a matter of time before I fall off the wagon.  What to do?

 

Speedos - My confession

Attractive swim wear

RULES OF THE POOL

Years ago I used to be a swimming teacher and one of the rules about entering the swimming pool, for the males, was they should wear Speedos.  It seemed very sensible and logical to me at the time.  I even had a supply of spare ones for those silly boys who forget their own and foolishly turned up for swimming lessons wearing huge impractical board shorts.  "No no no".  I would say.  "You can't move properly in the water wearing those ridiculous items.  All that material flapping around your leg gets in the way of swimming, is uncomfortable and heavy when wet".  And I sent them back to the changing rooms to put on the Speedos I very helpfully kept for such occasions.

SHOWING THIGHS

It was an international school.  The Europeans never batted an eyelid at the rule.  The Americans, well that was another matter.  They hated wearing the Speedos and deemed them underwear.  Even the youngest kindergarten kids thought of wearing Speedos for swimming in was showing your underwear to the world.  The Arab kids hated them too, I guess it was an issue about showing thighs although I never really worked it out.

LYCRA

We had to lighten up on the rule after a while and relaxed it to allowing shorts that covered the leg as long as they were tight.  That essentially meant the boys who couldn't cope with the classic Speedo swam in lycra cycling shorts.

I don't understand why it is unacceptable for men or boys, come to that, to wear Speedos in a public place.  They are much much more practical for swimming in, sunbathing in and they dry quickly. 

HUGE SHORTS

Why oh why are huge, garishly patterned extra long legged board short acceptable attire for swimming in?   They are the most ridiculous item unless, of course, you are actually surfing and then they protect your legs from getting a nasty rash.  But once out of the water should be removed so that the tops of the legs can be evenly tanned.  Otherwise tops of boys legs remain a lily sickly white all year round and that is not a good look.

HAIR REMOVAL

Us females are required to remove all traces of pubic hair so that none of it sticks out from the edge of our tiny tiny bikini bottoms and we have to constantly be on guard against movement of the bikini top in case the tiny triangle moves to one side or the other and exposes a nipple!  But men can be as hairy down below as they please and wear huge shorts to the pool.

Huge shorts do not disguise an expanding waist line or sagging pecs.  The one piece for men has not caught on.  The shorts don't hide anything apart from legs and I for one am not averse to looking at mens legs, whereas a flabby torso is not so good.

WHAT ARE YOU HIDING?

So are we talking about a fear of penis here?  Is it that the wearing of Speedos means that we can make out the outline of the penis under the lycra?  Why?  Let's stop being scared of them and stop pretending they are not there. 

AGREE WITH LESLEY

If you are a supporter of the wearing of Speedos make a banner and parade it  around with you the next time you go swimming.  I suggest I AGREE WITH LESLEY on your sign.  Take a photo and post it on my blog to show your allegiance to the small Speedo instead of the silly board shorts.

 

England 1 USA 1 World Cup 2010

WORLD CUP EXCITEMENT

I am being swept along with the build up to the World Cup.  Ah, memories of a faster heart beat and slight shortness of breath when I reinact previous England games I have watched during previous World Cup tournaments.  I can recreate the electric atmosphere in a bar filled with England fans, the camaraderie, the hilarious banter, the red and white George Cross prominent.  I get exciting and most of all I get patriotic.

SHORT MEMORY

You see for long periods of time I don't like football at all.  I am only and exclusively interested in England games once every four years.  I think it must be like having a baby.  Women have more than one baby because they can't remember the pain of labour, they forget how terrible it was and embark upon second, third and even fourth pregnancies because they get carried away with the falling in love with the baby part and obliterate the part when they were screaming for mercy and any form of pain killer available.

ENGLISH RESPONSIBILITY

I can only remember the thrill of the win.  I forget the disappointing empty feeling I am left with when they lose.  That memory must be shelved somewhere in my hard drive waiting to be deleted forever.  I can't help myself but will England to victory because it is my country.  I can't let them play unsupported, it is my responsibility as an English citizen.

2am WAKE UP CALL

So when I realized that their first match in the World Cup against USA was not on our telly and was at 2.30am I had no hesitation but to commit to viewing it in a bar somewhere in Hong Kong.  I just had to.  OK OK to be honest I was horrified at the kick off time and spent Saturday thinking about watching it or not, but it's so late, so early, so inconvenient... but in the end I decided I would go to bed, set the alarm for 2am, get up and go to Sai Kung.  It's only every four years  after all.

SO PATRIOTIC

And that is what we did.  The hard core, patriotic England supporters where in Sai Kung at 2.30am technically Sunday morning.  POETS was our bar of choice.  We were tucked in the corner with a great view of the screen and the pints of Guinness flowed.  To my surprise there were Americans in the bar too.  Oh well, live and let live!  The thrill of the first goal five minutes in resulted in much cheering and merriment.  It WAS worth getting up at such an unearthly hour.  But then the USA scored.  A plain stupid mistake by the England goalie with slippy gloves saw the score go to 1-1 and we all moaned in unison. 

HALF TIME ACTIVITY

The score remained like that until half time when I had a walk around a very quiet Sai Kung to find The Duke of York, Bacco and Cheers all full of dedicated England watchers.  Steamers was closed. I did spot one drunk at this point but she was causing no trouble, just meandering, staggering home.  I called in the Golden Arches eatery and joined a queue of blokes buying half-time snacks and talking about football.  Two wearing the obligatory football T-shirt and one wearing evening dress, white shirt, black bracers, silk stripe on the trouser.  Wow!  Such a high standard of attire for football viewing I thought.  We all had to wait far too long for our fast food,  McDonald's was not ready for a half time rush! 

DISAPPOINTMENT

Back to POETS for the second half which was uneventful and unconvincing.  That empty feeling was back.  There was no further goal and our boys showed little in the way of creativity or determination to take the lead.  I hope they read my blog and can fully understand the major effort it was to view their lack luster performance at 2.30am only to be let down.  The next game is Friday 18th June against Algeria.

Come on England!

What Next?

LAST TWO - LEE AND CRYSTAL

I know I've been banging on and on about American Idol.  Even when its been a tad boring I have stuck with it.  Now the last week is dawning. Wednesday and Thursday will be the last episodes with only two contestants remaining, Lee and Crystal.

SIMON COWELL

This is good news for Lesley's List because it means that out of the 16 I selected as possibilities to win, I still have one in the final.  Crystal Bowersox made it onto my list during the auditions round and there she is, in the final. So I win a million dollars?  I reckon I am tops at picking out the real talent and so should take over from Simon Cowell as top mean British judge when he stops doing Idol next year.  Season Ten could be Randy, Ellen, Kara and Lesley.   I wonder how much they pay?

WHEN IDOL IS OVER WATCH THE WORLD CUP 2010

But what worries me is - what am I going to do when Idol finishes?  Do you think there are counselling sessions available for viewers who suffer withdrawal symptoms?  People who find themselves  wandering around with stunned expressions, unable to concentrate on anything because their weekly routine has become so entrenched with America Idol they don't know where to turn once its over.   Such people will require post traumatic Americal Idol group counselling sessions where everyone can thrap on about their favourite, why there will never be another Adam Lambert and where on earth is Kriss Allen anyway, they can all practice their favourite judge impression and perhaps even have group sessions involving standing up clapping and yelling You had a moment dawg"  or such like.

Never fear.  I have a suggestion to all Idol addicts - watch the World Cup.

ENGLAND SUPPORT FOR EVER

I never thought I would find myself saying this because watching football is definitely not my thing.  But something happens to me every four years.  I turn into a football fan and I have even considered buying myself a polyester top emblazoned in garish logos.  Obviously I resisted that.  I am patriotic though.  I can't deny it.  I support England.  I really really want them to win.  My football fan hormones are about to kick in.  You know the ones that convince you that England are the best team ever, it's almost like having a child that can do no wrong.  No one can say anything negative about England that I believe and I become blinkered and dogmatic about their skill.

SHORT MEMORY

I have already forgotten about the last time when I was so excited about their every game when my hopes were dashed when they lost and got knocked out.  The world cup is about to start again so the slate is clean.  I await their success with an open heart and I believe they will win.  Engerland, Engerland, Engerland nah nah.

Circuit Training - Sai Kung Tang Shiu Kin Sports Ground

Teacher's Race!

Sai Kung is a marvelous place to live.  I know I am in danger of become a Sai Kung bore but I believe it to be true.  Once you live in Sai Kung you'll never have to go anywhere else.  There is no need for fancy, expensive gym membership because there is - wait for it - the 'outside' for running in.  No need for running machines installed infront of televisions to slowly stagnate the brain because it is possible to step outside your door and just start your exercise.

OUTDOOR TRAINING

As well as the countryside there is also the excellent public facility right in the centre of the town, Sai Kung Tang Shiu Kin Sports Ground.  The track has people running all the time.  Some are potential Olympians and some are grannies flip flopping their way around, beware of them - they may overtake you. 

[email protected]  Nina Blacklock

As an added extra bonus there is the lovely Nina Blacklock who offers outdoor circuit training sessions at the ground, Monday to Thursday every week and I strongly recommend them.

DO YOU WANT  CHALLENGE?

There are beginners and general sessions in the evenings which involve getting your heart thumping out of your chest and a copious amounts of sweat gushing from your skin.  There is a mixture of women and men and ability.  Be warned, Nina will challenge you! 

A typical class will start off with a run around the track.  Yes you heard me, all the way round one time.  I have to admit to being stunned at being asked to do such a thing the first time and really thought I would never make it. But, at my own pace I did it.

WHAT TO EXPECT

She will follow this by stretching and balance warm ups and then the fun starts.  Making good use of the sports ground we will be given exercises to do which target various parts of the body.  There will be lunges and squats, press ups, triceps dips, sprints, planks - pant pant pant - may be a rest if you're good, but no slacking at this point because you'll probably have to do it all again, then core then may be another run around the track and of course the stretch and cool down to finish.

By that time an hour will have disappeared and we'll all be begging for mercy...not really (well a bit) But it is worth it for the fantastic buzz of endorphins and with any luck those stubborn fat stores will be left at the track instead of hanging around my middle.

CONTACT NINA

If you are interested you can contact Nina Blacklock on her email for more details of times. [email protected]

The photo is me running at my school's sports day in the dreaded teachers race - something I never would have attempted before Nina's Outdoor Sessions.   Whether this is a good or a bad thing?  The jury is still out on that one.
 

 

 

The Final 9 - American Idol Season 9 - Didi goes home

It should have been Tim Urban.

I sound like a jilted lover by proxy!  But you see Didi is on my 'LIST'.  MY LIST of potential finalists was carefully selected during the audition rounds and includes Andrew Garcia, Crystal Bowersox, Michael Lynche and it used to include Didi Benami but after America voted Didi went home last night.

Everyone can see, hear and even smell that Tim Urban is struggling to perform anything.  He has a weak voice.  Perhaps it's the hair that keeps the votes coming in?  He does nothing for me, I am not a fan of hair!   After Didi's demise the voice of God AKA Simon did not decide to give her a second chance so off she goes.   It must be next week that we wave goodbye to Tim's floppy fringe?

So now my list is:-

Andrew Garcia

Crystal Bowersox

Michael Lynche

Obviously I wish I had Siobhan Magnus on there as she is fab and groovy, if not a bit screamy, but we all love a good scream on a Wednesday night don't we?

 

 

 

What do you hate?

As I mature and develop into a much wiser human being (that just means I'm getting old) I now know there are things I just don't like.  At some point there will be things you only think you don't like but may not have actually tried them.  But as the years go by and more experiences are open to you, you have opportunities to try different things.  You can't like everything can you? 

By the process of elimination I now have a very definite list of things I don't like, dare I say, hate?

So here is my worst case scenario.

I am alone on a boat.

The toilet facilities involve squatting.

The only thing to eat is tinned tomatoes with brown sauce and piccalilli.

The tv remote has broken and the only programme I can watch is Extreme Makeoverr Home Edition.

I only have access to the South China Morning Post without the letters page and The Sun.

When not watching Extreme Makeover Home Edition and Sky News I have to play Monopoly.

The only beverage is espresso.

I am visited at night by a rat.

 I am visited occasionally by a rotweiler.

The sun is burning hot and I have no suncream or shade but my feet are in a cold draught all the time.

The only decoration on the boat is a picture of Hello Kitty.

I can listen to music but it is classical and jazz.

My clothes are all made from 100% polyester.

The only cooling device is a ceiling fan.

I have long hair.

Sometimes I am allowed off the boat, say if the water is too calm so I actually stop feeling sea sick, and taken on a trip where I visit a dried fish and tofu shop.

I am made to join a prayer circle.

So what makes you sick, what makes your skin crawl, what brings you out in a cold sweat?

  

Wise Words from George

Och Lesley you are prompting me to comment on the subject which I feel mighty ambivalent.... ambivalent about commenting and about the issue subject itself but what the heck I will even reply to all of your doting blog recipients no sarckiness intended I promise So the manipulated masses both inside and outside of the house are teased and tormented for blatant commercial purposes... But the complex weave of contradictory feelings leave us all feeling a little muddled perhaps?? Should we tune in to see what all the fuss is about? I have been watching some but not all first eviction evidently watched by a measly 3.2m so crank up the tension provoke the inevitable power struggle between 'Alpha or dominant women' and wadda-you-get.... ego mayhem... Is it racially driven? I say not has it go racial elements or undertones? Of course it has is it vindictive and malicious? It certainly was but was it for racial reasons? I say no... Curiously for me the Jade Goody outburst I felt was not as sinisterly racially influenced as the throw away comments particularly from Danielle who again I can almost feel pity for as I see her as mainly motivated by a need for approval from the dominant Jade and revealing more entrenched racial stereotyping attitudes than Jade herself. Is Jade a bully however? Well yes but aren't we all in certain settings can we be judgmental? Can we lack empathy? Do we put our own values to one side before we take a view are we often intolerant? Can we be hostile and unkind when we perceive injustice, course we can its about degrees and threat... Jade was very threatened by Shipla for all the obvious reasons. I am not being overly sympathetic here just observing the obvious. Poor old Jade our favourite apology of an English treasure the iconoclastic tomb stone shall read......... 'She lived the dream then it killed her' The ethical/ moral dilemma, speaking as a fellow Fishburner who like you I dare say was brought up in a household that more from ignorance, unfamiliarity, some fear and prejudice almost innocence referred to non white skinned people as 'Blackies' and had a fundamental mistrust and unquestioning dismissiveness but not aggressive view of foreigners the key struggle I am still left with, is the difficulty of what you can and can't say to someone when outraged, incensed, provoked or seriously wronged. Insults are meant to hurt verbal assaults are less hurtful, painful, than physical ones but being cut up in the car by a women or man respectively can produce instinctive sexist outbursts, being cut up by a fat lorry driver can produce crude personal disdain based on fattist, boorish attitudes or prejudices toward out fellow man. Being cut up by a bullish Afro Caribbean man or any kind of clearly identifiable non Anglo Saxon white extraction type then we must immediately stifle any reaction acknowledging ethnic difference otherwise we are on a charge like Janet Street Porter whatever she was supposed to have said recently to her neighbor.... So where am I left ... I think being ambivalent still but this time about my inability to either be firm one way or the other on this issue or to offer anything very original that’s the main reason for hesitating saying much.... There is a debate to be had here including where does this lead? 5-10 20yrs hence? Bolt onto this almost incidental trivia of a cynical reality game show which has the 'victim' Shilpa earning £350k just for going into the house and who, lets face it, has conducted herself impeccably no doubt the contracts will come rolling in... add to the question of implications for the future and the hysteria created (rightly or wrongly - I make no judgment of that) the evolution of racial / ethnic and religious division and the terrorist threat then glory be.... we could be reflecting that it was that Jade Goody that brought about the race wars of the 21st century..... there is a rather pleasing ridiculousness to that one I feel I would rather be annihilated because of her than Mr Bush... for ironic and comedy reasons only you understand. Thanks Lesley enjoyed the thinking out loud on this one next blog about Desperate Housewives please Xxx Georgio

Celebrity Big Brother

  Celebrity Big Brother is once again appealing to the voyeuristic nature of the public and this time its really excelled itself.  The ratings are sky high.  There are always complaints about it, mostly because of the z list celebrities whose agents have convinced them it will boost their failing career and the viewers are tortured by having to watch inane has-beens.  This time the complaints are more serious.  The topic which has boosted the ratings is racist bullying.

What I find totally perplexing is the fact that what goes on in the Big Brother house can become of such high media interest that it leaves the domain of entertainment and enters the NEWS.  Therefore, generating stories which are beamed around the world faster than a speeding bullet which in turn generates ratings.  Am I being cynical here by suggesting that it is Big Brother himself who is fuelling the news articles, interviews and over head helicopter interest? Is the Thought Police at work and are we not even aware of it?  Or (theme from the Twilight Zone) are we the Thought Police?  I mean the royal 'we' of course.  'We' , including Gordon Brown, are deciding whose thoughts are right or wrong and making the decision to have the ones with the wrong thoughts eliminated, oh sorry I mean evicted from the house?

On my journey to work which involves a short train ride towards Shatin in the New Territories, the KCR train has a tv which broadcasts news in Cantonese to the commuters who stare blankly at it morning after morning.  It is usually Hong Kong based news - very dull.  Nothing much happens apart from the Hang Seng Index going up or down.  But this morning I was jolted out of my ipod world as I heard an English voice, Essex accent at that.  It was that thicko Jade Goody.  Yes, Big Brother has made it to Hong Kong.  I was horrified to see a close up of her frog mouth on my way to work. There is no escape we are watching Big Brother.